SNL Transcripts: Steve Martin: 02/04/06: A Teddy Bear Holding a Heart


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 31: Episode 12

05l: Steve Martin / Prince

A Teddy Bear Holding a Heart

Woman…..Amy Poehler
Man…..Will Forte
Voice Over…..Kristen Wiig

[open on a couple walking through a park, depicted in muted tones, with string-heavy classical music playing]

Voice Over: This Valentine’s Day, give her something she’ll never forget. [birds fly overhead] A gift that not only says, “I love you,” [the couple walk down steps] but “I know you.” [they walk past a puddle] Show her she means the world to you, by giving her the only thing as unique and exquisite as she is. The perfect way to say, “Our love is eternal.” [they sit by a fountain] The gift that whispers, “Be mine forever.” [he kneels and gives her a bright red box] A teddy bear holding a heart. [we see the box from her perspective, and it contains such a teddy bear, and she is delighted] The gift that says, “I put a lot of time and thought into this. I’ve known that Valentine’s Day was coming for quite some time now. It did not sneak up on me.” [dissolve to the bear in its box surrounded by red fabric, with flowers falling all around it, and with a small, red heart logo reading “A Teddy Bear Holding a Heart,” and dissolve back to the park, where women sitting nearby are excited to see the gift the woman has received] Deep emotions can’t always be expressed in words. [he holds her as they twirl around and around, her outstretched hand holding the bear as she looks lovingly at it] But when you hand her a teddy bear holding a heart, she’ll know exactly what you mean to her. [they kiss] A teddy bear holding a heart. [dissolve to the box as seen before, with logo, and with title: “Available almost anywhere”] Available literally almost anywhere. Book stores, Hallmark’s, drug stores, Wal-Mart, 7-11, I’m guessing wherever you buy milk.

[fade to black]

Submitted by: DavidK93

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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