SNL Transcripts: Annette Bening: 12/09/06: An SNL Movie Trailer Recut

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 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 32: Episode 8



06h: Annette Bening / Gwen Stefani, Akon

An SNL Movie Trailer Recut

[MPAA logo. “R” for Restricted.] [Opens with Mayan indian Jaguar Paw opening his eyes,dramatic music, shot of the rising sun]

Caption on black screen: From Mel Gibson. AcademyAward Winning Director of Braveheart and The Passion of the Christ.

[Shot of a panther’s eye]

Caption on black screen: What would cause one of thegreatest civilizations in history….

[Shots of Mayan sculptures, statues]

Caption on black screen: To dissapear?

[Shot of Jaguar Paw bound and sitting on the jungle,looks up and answers]

Jaguar Paw:[Subtitled] The Jews.

[Shots of Mayan indians running like hell through the jungle]

Caption subtitles: The jews are coming!! Run for your lives!!

[Mayan chief stands on top of a pyramid, hands up,talks to a large crowd below]

Mayan chief: [Subtitled]Hey, you guys! The jews areresponsible for all the wars in the world![shot ofMayan women laughing] What are you laughing at, sugartits? Aw, I didn’t mean it. I’m so wasted right now.

[Quick action montage]

Caption: Mel Gibson’s Apocalypto

[Shot of creepy Mayan girl]

Mayan Girl: [Whispers. Subtitles] I smell bagels.

[Screen turns black] [Cheers and applause]

Submitted by: Waldo San Miguel

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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