SNL Transcripts: Jeremy Piven: 01/20/07: MacGruber III


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 32: Episode 11

06k: Jeremy Piven / AFI

MacGruber III

Jojo…..Jeremy Piven
Casey…..Maya Rudolph
MacGruber…..Will Forte

[FADE IN on opening sequence.]

The guy’s a freakin’ genius!

[CUT to MacGruber in a karate pose against footage of flames.]

Singers: MACGRUBER-RRR!!!!!

[CUT to an old fishing boat tied to a dock. SUPERIMPOSE, “Prison Boat.” CUT to a sign marked “Boat Control Room” as sirens wail.]

Jojo: [struggling with door] This boat door is welded shut!

Casey: We’ve got a doozy on our hands, MacGruber. That’s over ten pounds of c-bar explosives. This baby’s gonna blow in three seconds!

MacGruber: We can do this! Jojo! Hand me that old bucket filled with bum sperm.

Jojo: [disgusted] No.

[CUT to the boat exploding in flames.]

Singers: MACGRUBER-RRR!!!!!

[FADE to black over applause.]

Submitted by: Sean

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King is directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him nine Emmys and thirteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Mr. King is also the creative director of Broadway Worldwide which brings theatrical events to theaters. The company has produced Smokey Joe’s Café; Putting It Together with Carol Burnett; Jekyll & Hyde; and Memphis, all directed by Mr. King. He completed the screen capture of Broadway's Romeo & Juliet in 2013. - LinkedIn

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