SNL Transcripts: Jon Bon Jovi: 10/13/07: Postseason ’07

 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 33: Episode 3

07c: Jon Bon Jovi / Foo Fighters

Postseason ’07

Dane Cook…..Jason Sudeikis

[ open on Dane Cook ]

Dane Cook: [ manic ] The 2007 Play-offs! It all comes down to — [ points his fingers down ] THIS! Red Sox versus Indians! It’s like the French-Indian War! But, instead of the French, it’s BASEBALL PLAYERS! From Boston: you got Josh Beckett! Curt Schilling! Daisuke Matsuzaka! But, against the Indians, they’re gonna need more than blankets with smallpox! They’re gonna need baseball hits! Just ask C.C. Sabathia! This C.C.’s not a Music Factory — he’s the PITCHING FACTORY!! Adn the only reservation these Indians care about.. is a reservation.. for the World Series! Ther’s only ONE Play-offs! They’re only ONE October! And there’s only ONE logical spokesman for baseball: DANE COOK! [ gives the Super-Finger ] [ cut to graphic: “Postseason ’07. There’s only one October.” ] [ fade ]

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