SNL Transcripts: Jon Bon Jovi: 10/13/07: Postseason ’07 II

 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 33: Episode 3

07c: Jon Bon Jovi / Foo Fighters

Postseason ’07 II

Dane Cook…..Jason Sudeikis

[ open on Dane Cook ]

Dane Cook: [ manic ] The NLCS! It all comes down to — [ points his fingers down ] THIS! Nine games! five innings! One strike! It’s the Colorado Rockies versus the Arizona D-Backs! Arizona’s goal? Scoring goals! Baseball goals! Brandon Webb — [ points fingers in Spiderman pose ] schoom! Spiderman reference! And there’s probably a player named Ramirez! Meanwhile, the Rockies haven’t been this good since thye beat Hulk Hogan and Mr. T in the same movie! Todd Helton shouldn’t have a batting average — he should have a batting outstanding! The Diamondbacks versus the Colorado Rockies — I’m pretty sure one of them’s a hockey team! Which one? You’ll have to watch to find out! ‘Cause there’s twenty guys on the field, but there’s only ONE baseball Grammy! There’s only ONE October, and there are 300 of these promos! [ gives the Super-Finger ] [ cut to graphic: “Postseason ’07. There’s only one October.” ] [ fade ]

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