Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 34: Episode 3
September 27th, 2008
CBS Evening NewsSummary: Part 4 of Katie Couric’s (Amy Poehler) interview with Sarah Palin (Tina Fey) leaves the anchorman flustered by the governor’s folksy responses.
Recurring Characters: Katie Couric, Sarah Palin.
Anna Faris’ MonologueSummary: Anna Faris lets the audience in on a secret: she really is a dumb blonde.
Making New FriendsSummary: After dropping their new friends (Bobby Moynihan, Casey Wilson) home, a couple (Jason Sudeikis, Anna Faris) contemplates the numerous ways they might have offended them over dinner.
Presidential DebateSummary: Jim Lehrer (Chris Parnell) moderates the first Presidential debate between Barack Obama (Fred Armisen) and John McCain (Darrell Hammond).
Recurring Characters: Jim Lehrer, Barack Obama, John McCain, Hillary Clinton.
Rowboat DateSummary: Dimwitted Mary (Anna Faris) is enamored by her new boyfriend (Kenan Thompson) during their musical midnight boat ride, until she realizes he might just be a hit man assigned to kill her.
Duffy performs “Mercy”Lyrics
Weekend Update with Amy Poehler & Seth MeyersSummary: Former President Bill Clinton (Darrell Hammond) can’t quite bring himself to endorse Barack Obama. Travel writer Judy Grimes (Kristen Wiig) still counters her nervousness by constantly kidding around.
ScoresSummary: A trio of strippers (Anna Faris, Kristen Wiig, Casey Wilson) are opposed to closing off the Champagne Room simply because the Wall Street bailout crisis will prevent their regular clients from being able to afford their services.
Deep House DishSummary: DJ Dynasty Handbag (Kenan Thompson) continues to dish on the club music scene with co-host T’Shane (Andy Samberg).
Recurring Characters: DJ Dynasty Handbag, T’Shane.
Googie Rene’s Slightly Stained Wedding Dress BasementSummary: Googie Rene (Kenan Thompson) sells bridal gowns at a discount because his inventory comes complete with stains.
Note: This sketch was cut from the dress rehearsal for the episode hosted by Michael Phelps.
Duffy performs “Standing Stone
My Ex-BoyfriendSummary: Josh (Bill Hader) is proud to show off his new girlfriend, Sarah (Anna Faris), to his friends (Jason Sudeikis, Casey Wilson), except that she won’t stop talking glowingly about her ex-boyfriend.