SNL Transcripts: Anna Faris: 09/27/08: Anna Faris’ Monologue


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 34: Episode 3

08c: Anna Faris / Duffy

Anna Faris’ Monologue

…..Anna Faris

Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen — Anna Faris!

Anna Faris: Thank you, thank you very, very much! You guys, I’m SO excited to be here, hosting “Saturday Night Live”. A lot of you know me from my movie, “The House Bunny”… (audience applauds) and, uh… I’ve played a lot of parts when I’ve had to be a blonde, and because of that, a lot of people think I am a dumb blonde, and I’m here to tell you it’s totally true. I am, and I just want you all to know, I’m fine with that! I’m just enjoying life, having a good time, so what I do care if I’m a little bit of an airhead?

(Camera cuts away from audience to side of Anna; she turns and looks)

But can I tell you a secret? I’ll be in a conversation sometimes, and not only will I not know what people are talking about, I’ll forget who they are. It’s like my head is a prison.

(Looks back at audience)

Whoo! But you know, enough about that, I am so psyched to be here! All week, I was like “What day is the show happening?” And they were like “Saturday!” And I was like “You’re joking!” And they were all “Why do you think it’s called Saturday Night Live?”

(Camera again turns to sideview of Anna)

But the thing is, I had no idea it was called that. I didn’t even know this was a TV show until like an hour ago.

(Looks back at audience)

Whoo! But the important thing is we are gonna have fun tonight, and I know a thing or two about fun! Party!

(Camera again cuts away from audience; Anna pauses)

I… forgot what I was gonna say.

(Looks back at audience)

Whoo! Oh yeah, I remember! We got a great show for you tonight! Duffy is here! I hope that’s a person! So stick around, and we will be right back!

Submitted by: Joe Murray

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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