Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 34: Episode 4
08d: Anne Hathaway / The Killers
The Less Provocative Songs Of Katy Perry
Katy Perry…..Casey Wilson
Female Golfer…..Kristen Wiig
Announcer: Katy Perry…This girl is taking America by storm with her riskee single “I Kissed A Girl”.
Katy Perry: [ singing ]
“I Kissed A Girl and I liked it
The taste of her cherry chapstick
I Kissed a Girl and I liked it
I hope my boyfriend don’t mind it.”
Announcer: Yeow…Talk about sexual. And just when you thought Katy Perry couldn’t be any naughtier…she didn’t. That’s right, it’s the Less Provocative Songs of Katy Perry. With family friendly hits like “I ate a Snack.”
Katy Perry: [ singing ]
“I ate a snack and I liked it
it was a Twix with peanut butter
I ate a snack with my girlfriend,
but we didn’t do any gay stuff.”
Announcer: The Less Provocative Songs of Katy Perry. Cuz if you take away the blunt sexual overtones, this girl still has plenty to sing about.
Katy Perry: [ singing ] “I saw a boat and I liked it…” (shrugs and mouths “I don’t know”)
Announcer: Just wow… believe it or not, they’re almost all that good. Rolling Stone magazine says “No.” This is the only album where you’ll find such soon-to-be classics such as “I Threw a Ball”, “I Peeled Some Fruit”, “I Own A Pen”, and the exquisite, “I Held a Cat”
Katy Perry: [ singing ]
“I held a cat and I liked it,
its fur was soft like the touch of a woman
I held a cat in the shower
then I french kissed a female golfer.”
[ a female golfer is is uncomfortable by this gesture, then begins to lean into it ]
Announcer: Uh oh! Ha! Just ignore that last one. The Less Provocative Songs of Katy Perry. Now available in stores.
[ fade ]
Submitted by: JMan
