Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 34: Episode 9
Tim McGraw’s Monologue
Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen — Tim McGraw!
Tim McGraw: Wow! Thank you very much! Thank you! I never thought I’d be hosting “Saturday Night Live”. But it’s great to be here during such an exciting time in America. Change is sweeping the nation, and there’s a feeling that anything is possible. Fro example: a country singer is hosting “Saturday Night Live”, and the musical guests are Ludacris and T-Pain! [ audience cheers ] Well, you may not know this, but this is actually the very first time the three of us have worked together. It’s crazy, right? I know! And I’m sure many hip-hop fans are tuning in tonight, and, if I may, I’d like to take a moment to speak directly to them:[ close-up ]
Hi! I’m Tim McGraw… and you have never heard of me. I write songs and perform them in a genre known as Country. Now, I know it’s not the same as Hip-Hop, but you might enjoy the wholesome world that is Country music. We sing about things like family, friendship, and, well, hope. Now, of course, sometimes we sing about things like drinking, or drinking and fighting. But, mainly it is about family, or about your wife, or… cheating on your wife. Or your wife cheating on you with another man, and you killing that man. Or killing your wife. Or shooting a man in Reno just to watch him die. That actually is, kind of, like, our big song. But, the point is: you know, give it a shot! You might even like it. Here — here’s an example:[ he picks up a microphone and begins to sing ]
“Girl, you’ve never known no one like me
Up there in your high society.
They might tell you I’m no good
Girl, they need to understand — come on!
Just who I am
I may be a real bad boy
But, baby, I’m a real good man.”
We have a FANTASTIC show tonight! We got Ludacris! And T-Pain up in here! Y’all hang around, we’ll be right back!