SNL Transcripts: Neil Patrick Harris: 01/10/08


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 34: Episode 12

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Air Date:


Musical Guest:

Special Guests:


Bit Players:

January 10th, 2009

Neil Patrick Harris

Taylor Swift


Liza Minnelli


The Rachel Maddow ShowSummary: Rachel Maddow (Abby Elliott) interviews disgraced former Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich (Jason Sudekis) and his Sente appointee, Roland Burris (Kenan Thompson).

Recurring Characters: Rod Blagojevich.



Neil Patrick Harris’ MonologueSummary: Neil Patrick Harris makes a point-for-point criticism of former child star Fred Savage’s SNL hosting stint in 1990, and is then made the object of poorly-constructed jokes by a group of goofy audience members (Fred Armisen, Bill Hader, Bobby Moyhnihan) and Mark Wahlberg (Andy Samberg).

Recurring Characters: Mark Wahlberg.


TodaySummary: The fourth and final hour of “Today” is a train wreck, as co-hosted by chatty Kathie Lee Gifford (Kristen Wiig) and an insufferable Hoda Kotb (Michaela Watkins). Tensions build when they welcom a fitness instructor (Neil Patrick Harris) to the set.

Recurring Characters: Kathie Lee Gifford.

Save BroadwaySummary: At Sardi’s, a group of Broadway performers struggle to find a way to keep the faltering economy from preventing the cancellation of their long-running stage shows.


PenelopeSummary: Penelope (Kristen Wiig) one-ups the other members of a gropu therapy session by bragging of her close friendship with Liza Minnelli.

Recurring Characters: Penelope, Lou.

An SNL Digital ShortSummary: “Doogie Howser, M.D.” theme song.

Taylor Swift performs “Love Story”

Weekend Update with Seth MeyersSummary: Charles Barkley (Kenan Thompson) makes excuses for his latest traffic violation. Will Forte sings a song about the BCS.

Recurring Characters: Charles Barkley.

Two First NamesSummary: Neil Patrick Harris welcomes other famous celebrities with two first names, while shunning wanna-bes like Daniel-Day Lewis (Bill Hader).

Recurring Characters: David Lee Roth, Jamie Lee Curtis, Daniel-Day Lewis.

Fran & FrebaSummary: Long-nailed air traffic controllers Fran (Neil Patrick Harris) and Freba (Kristen Wiig) gab about co-worker Gil (Will Forte).

Frost/Other Peopleb>Summary: In a trailer for the “Frost/Noxin” sequel, David Frost (Neil Patrick Harris) ineptly interviews a slew of other 70’s-era celebrities with little to hide.

Recurring Characters: David Frost, Richard Nixon, David Bowie, David Crosby, Paul Lynde.


Taylor Swift performs “Forever & Always”

Whopper VirginsSummary: Burger King execs (Neil Patrick Harris, Kristen Wiig) discover immigrants (Bobby Moyhnihan, Michaela Watkins, Fred Armisen) who not only have never eaten a Whopper but are also unable to comprehend its purpose.




Dress Rehearsal Cuts

Lawyer’s Office

Question BoxSummary: Randy student (Andy Samberg) embarrasses his teacher (Neil Patrick Harris) by placing sexual questions in the class question box.

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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