Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 34: Episode 14
08n: Steve Martin / Jason Mraz
MacGruber III
MacGruber…..Will Forte
Vicky…..Kristen Wiig
MacGyver… Richard Dean Anderson
[FADE IN on the ends of two electric wires as a spark jumps between them. CUT among various shots of pontoon planes, hands tinkering with materials, and exploding buildings.]
Singers:
“MacGruber!
Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi!
MacGruber!
Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi!
MacGruber!
Pepsi!, Pepsi!, Pepsi!”
[CUT to MacGruber holding Pepsi cans on both hands against footage of flames.]
Singers: “MACGRUBER-RRR!!!!!… PEPSI!”
[CUT to an Italian mafia hideout. SUPERIMPOSE caption, “Italian Mafia Hideout.” CUT to a sign marked “Mafia Hideout Control Room” as sirens wail.]
MacGyver: [struggling with locked door] MacGruber, this door is sealed shut!
Vicky: And we only have 15 seconds!!!
MacGruber: [Wearing a forehead band with the Pepsi globe and holding two Pepsi cans] Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi… Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi… [pointing to Vicky] Pepsi!, Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi…
Vicky: I don’t understand what you’re saying!
MacGruber: Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi!…
MacGyver: You’re such a sell out!!
MacGruber: [pointing to MacGyver] Pepsi, Pepsi… Pepsi, Pepsi…
MacGyver: Would you stop saying “Pepsi”?!
MacGruber: [now holding two cans of Diet Pepsi] Diet Pep…
[CUT to the italian mafia hideout exploding and spewing smoke everywhere.]
Singers: MACGRUBER-RRR!!!!!
Submitted by: Ramon