Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 35: Episode 7
09g: Joseph Gordon-Levitt / Dave Matthews Band
An SNL Digital Short
…..Andy Samberg
“Reba McEntire”…..Kenan Thompson
Andy Samberg: [ singing ]“Oh! It’s been a long time coming.
Two of the world’s greatest.
America’s sweetheart, Ms. Reba McEntire.”
“Reba McEntire: [ singing ]“Yeah, yeah.
How ya doin Andy?”
Andy Samberg: [ singing ]“Were about to take it to the top.
Hit ’em, Reba!”
“Reba McEntire: [ singing ]“Haters in my face trying to keep me down
But you know we keep on shinin’.”
Andy Samberg: Here we go!
“Reba McEntire: [ singing ]“Two crazy big stars from opposite worlds
’bout to set this track on fire.”
Andy Samberg: Yeah!
“She’s the queen of country”
“Reba McEntire: [ singing ]“He’s the comedy prince
Making something out of nothing.”
Andy Samberg: Ha ha!
“We hooked up in the studio to make this song.”
“Reba McEntire: [ singing ]But as usual, we ended up f–king.
Andy Samberg: No doubt!
“Flash back to when I first met Reba
Sitcom dressing room, puffing on Cheeba.
Said I was a fan, she said, “Prove it.”
Dropped her denim skirt and said, “hop to it!”
Made love all night!
“Reba McEntire: More like we f–kin’!
Andy Samberg: [ singing ]“Kids banging on the door, trying to interrupt
But them autographs can wait, ‘cuz this is way too strong
I cant leave it alone, because her pussys the bomb!”
“Reba McEntire: [ singing ]“‘Well my pussy is the bomb and that’s a fact
But these N-words keep on trippin’.”
Andy Samberg: Okay!
“Reba McEntire”: [ singing ]“So I stay on my prime and drop these hits
‘Cuz I cant go back to strippin’.
Im Reba!”
Andy Samberg: [ singing ]“Youre my undercover freak!”
“Reba McEntire”: [ singing ]“And you’re my best friend, but our families dont approve.”
Andy Samberg: [ singing ]That’s right, ‘cuz Im a city boy.
“Reba McEntire”: [ singing ]“And I’m a country girlAnd I’ll never leave your sweet balls blue.”
Andy Samberg: [ singing ]‘That’s because a girl like Rebas got just what I need
With big broad shoulders and a red-ass weave.”
“Reba McEntire”: And a penis.
Andy Samberg: [ singing ]“Hot damn, she fly.
All she wanna do is bump me
Im a lucky guy.”
“Reba McEntire”: Im a guy, too.
Andy Samberg: [ singing ]“My friends think I should dump her
They say shes a man who found a wig in a dumpster.”
“Reba McEntire”: Your friends are smart.
Andy Samberg: [ singing ]“Nah, Rebes, they’re just jealous
‘Cuz Im dating a star instead of hanging with the fellas.”
“Reba McEntire”: Hanging like my nuts.
Andy Samberg: [ singing ]“Word up, theyre just liars.
They cant believe I can pull Reba McEntire.”
“Reba McEntire”: [ singing ]“Ever since I came out of my mamas butt
I knew I was destined for greatness.
I looked in a dumpster and saw a wig
And thought, “Hey brother, I’m gonna take this.”
Andy Samberg: Tell ’em, Reba!
“Reba McEntire”: [ singing ]“So I put it right on and took a stroll
Right over to 30 Rock.”
Andy Samberg: SNL!
“Reba McEntire”: [ singing ]“I saw Andy Samberg and he thought I was Reba
And I made him suck my dirty c-ck.”
Andy Samberg: [ singing ]“So there you have it
Two worlds collide
Were the new Bonnie and Clyde.”
“Reba McEntire”: Reba!
Andy Samberg: [ singing ]“From haystacks to maybacks, our love will survive
For Reba Ill ride ’til the day that we die.”
“Reba McEntire”: I’m Reba!
[ fade ]