SNL Transcripts: Blake Lively: 12/05/09: UPS I



 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 35: Episode 8




09h: Blake Lively / Rihanna

UPS I

Andy Azula…..Bill Hader

[ open on UPS logo ] [ dissolve to drawing of the word “UPS”, with drawings of a gift, the world, and a man’s head below it, as Andy Azula enters frame ]

Andy Azula: Alright, let’s talk about facts:

Did you know that, with UPS, you can ship your presents so they arrive Christmas morning? You can.

Did you know, with UPS, you can ship ANYWHERE in the world? It’s true.

And, did you know upS ads feature a man — [ he adds lines around the man’s face ] in a lady wig? And they can air up to eight times in a single football game? So much so, that you almost get used to it and start to enjoy it? [ he smiles ] Well, that’s true, too.

You see, this year — [ he points to each object drawn on the board ] UPS’s… gift… to the world… is me. [ he smiles ] A man in a lady wig! You’re welcome.

[ dissolve to slogan: “WHAT CAN BROWN DO FOR YOU?” ] [ UPS ] [ fade ]

SNL Transcripts

Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King is directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him nine Emmys and thirteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Mr. King is also the creative director of Broadway Worldwide which brings theatrical events to theaters. The company has produced Smokey Joe’s Café; Putting It Together with Carol Burnett; Jekyll & Hyde; and Memphis, all directed by Mr. King. He completed the screen capture of Broadway's Romeo & Juliet in 2013. - LinkedIn

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