SNL Transcripts: Miley Cyrus: 03/05/11: Rock-A-Billy Lady Party Moisturizing Facial Cream


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 36: Episode 16

10p: Miley Cyrus / The Strokes

Rock-A-Billy Lady Party Moisturizing Facial Cream

Jamilla Rose la Perkins…..Miley CyrusLynn Doot….. Kristen Wiig

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: Hello! my name is Jamilla Rose la Perkins.

Lynn Doot: And I’m Lynn Doot and we know what you’re thinking.

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: Wow! Those ladies have flawless, milky skin.

Lynn Doot: And they also look like they could rock out and jam to rock music that they make themselves.

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: That’s why were so excited to introduce our revolutionary new facial cream.

Lynn Doot: And our revolutionary Rock-A-Billy CD.

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: You’re going to love them both.

Lynn Doot: Why? Because there not sold separately.

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: Why?

Lynn Doot: Because there not ok? This cream locks in moisture and fights fine lines.

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: And this instrumental rock-a-bility music really rocks the jam.

Lynn Doot: What are they talking about?

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: This.

Lynn Doot: This.

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: Sounds great.

Lynn Doot: Absorbs. You’ll see results in just 2 weeks from the music.

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: You’ll see results in 5 to 6 weeks from the cream.

Lynn Doot: But know that each container only has 4 weeks of cream.

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: Oh know you better buy 2 creams.

Lynn Doot: But the good news is you’ll get another CD with the second cream. 2 creams so you won’t run out. And 2 CDs one for you and one for your car. And even one for your friend.

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: But if your friends likes the CD she’s eventually going to ask you about the cream that comes with it. And just know that with that cream you’re gonna get another CD or more.

Lynn Doot: So remember every time you get a cream there will be at least 1 CD as well.

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: Now, if you call right away and order 3 creams we’re gonna throw in a free CD.

Lynn Doot: You’ll be getting 3 creams and 4 CDs.

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: How ever once you open the cream you can not return the CD.

Lynn Doot: But if you open the CD you can return un-open creams. And you’ll get a free CD.

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: So basically you’re always going to be out creamed by your CDs.

Lynn Doot: Meaning you’ll always have more CDs than cream.

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: They get it. So pick up your phone and ask for a cream by name. It’s called Rock-A-Billy Lady Party.

Lynn Doot: And the CD is called Moisturizing Facial Cream.

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: Did we mean to do that?

Lynn Doot: Maybe or maybe there was a mistake in the printers.

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: Maybe someone warned someone not to use that printer.

Lynn Doot: Maybe someone should’ve checked.

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: Maybe someone would have but they were to busy watching there friends 2 year old all the time.

Lynn Doot: You love Beth.

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: Yes I do, but she’s a lot.

Lynn Doot: So call now

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: One operator is standing by.

Lynn Doot: And get ready to look good and rock out cause you kind of have to.

Jamilla Rose la Perkins: Meaning there not sold separately.

Lynn Doot: They get Jamilla Rose!

Announcer: Cream and CD sold separately.

Submitted by: Connor Cronholm

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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