SNL Transcripts: Mick Jagger: 05/19/12


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 37: Episode 22

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Air Date:


Musical Guest:

Special Guests:


Bit Players:

May 19th, 2012

Mick Jagger

Mick Jagger

Arcade Fire

Foo Fighters

Jeff Beck

Jon Hamm

Chris Parnell

Steve Martin

Lorne Michaels

Chris Kattan

Amy Poehler

Rachel Dratch

Will Forte


The Lawrence Welk ShowSummary:Lawrence Welk (Fred Armisen) welcomes the Spring season with a performance by Johnny Prosciutto (Jon Hamm), musical sisters Shirley (Abby Elliott), Nancy (Nasim Pedrad), Toni (Vanessa Bayer) and tiny-handed Dooneese (Kristen Wiig).

Recurring Characters: Lawrence Welk, Dooneese, Shirley, Nancy, Toni.


Mick Jagger’s MonologueSummary: Mick Jagger recites the frequently asked questions he receives from fans, and then provides the answer.


Secret WordSummary: Mindy Gracin (Kristen Wiig) once again reveals word clues while acting overtheatrical, while closeted Chaz Bragman (Mick Jagger) is very clear about his true sexual orientation.

Recurring Characters: Lyle Round, Mindy Gracin.

KaraokeSummary: At a karaoke bar, uptight insurance man Kevin Miller (Mick Jagger) can’t comprehend his co-workers’ inaccurate performances as Mick Jagger.

An SNL Digital ShortSummary: Andy Samberg and Chris Parnell rap about having mimosas for lunch and going to see “Sister Act” on Broadway, as they enjoy a “Lazy Sunday 2”.


Politics NationSummary: Gaffe-prone Al Sharpton (Kenan Thompson) attempts to discuss Wall Street’s effect on the economy by discussing jobs with J.P. Morgan spokesman Colin McKechnie (Mick Jagger), Mayor Mike Bloomberg (Fred Armisen) and a cannery worker (Jason Sudeikis).

Recurring Characters: Al Sharpton, Mike Bloomberg.

Note: This sketch was cut from the Dress Rehearsal of last week’s episode hosted by Will Ferrell.

Mick Jagger with Arcade Fire performs “The Last Time”Lyrics

Weekend Update with Seth MeyersSummary: City corresponent Stefon (Bill Hader) lists more inappropriate travel destinations for families planning to visit New York City over the summer.

Recurring Characters: Stefon.

So You Think You Can Dance At An Outdoor Music FestivalSummary: Dave Matthews (Bill Hader) hosts a competition to see who can perform the best dance moves while at an outdoor music festival.

Recurring Characters: Dave Matthews, Carlos Santana, Jewel, Steven Tyler.

Mick Jagger with Foo Fighters performs “19th Nervous Breakdown” and “It’s Only Rock ‘n Roll”Lyrics

The CaliforniansSummary: Stuart (Fred Armisen) and his Californian clan continue to speak in overexaggerated valley accents and provide driving directions within every conservation, as hidden family secrets are revealed.

Recurring Characters: Devon, Corina, Stuart, Trey, Maid.

Mick Jagger and Jeff Beck perform “Tea Party”Lyrics

She’s a Rainbow / GoodnightsSummary: 7-year student Kristen Wiig graduates from SNL’s Class of 2012 and dances with her fellow cast members.


Dress Rehearsal Cuts

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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