Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 38: Episode 1
Wooden Spoon Warehouse
Ezekiel Yoder…..Seth MacFarlane
Elijah Yoder…..Tim Robinson
[ open on Ezekiel and Elijah Yoder holding wooden spoons ]
Elijah Yoder: I’m Elijah Yoder.
Ezekiel Yoder: And I’m Ezekiel Yoder.
Elijah Yoder: Our family has been making and trading wooden spoons for over 100 summers!
Ezekiel Yoder: And now, thanks to a conversation my brother had with a fast-talking concrete-dwellin’ man, you can now purchase our wooden spoons on something called… Internet.
Elijah Yoder: To see our wooden spoons, just select these symbols on your light box![ they hold up the web address “www.woodenspoonwarehouse.com” on a sign ]
Ezekiel Yoder: Double valley, Double valley, Double valley. Time freckle. Double valley, Owl’s eyes, Stringless harp, Broken ladder, Hurt snake, Fine snake, Fat snake, Owl’s eyes, Hurt snake, Double valley, Lean-to, Fat snake with a sex penis, Broken ladder, Horse bridge, Child’s toy, Bull scrotum, The river what took my son… [ he bows his head ] The three-fingered man dot com.[ fade ]