Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 38: Episode 5
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Air Date:Host:Musical Guest:Special Guests:Cameos:Bit Players:
October 20th, 2012
Bruno Mars
Bruno Mars
None
Tom Hanks
None
Second Presidential Debate
Summary: Candy Crowley (Aidy Bryant) moderates a debate between President Barack Obama (Jay Pharoah) and Mott Romney (Jason Sudeikis) that quickly turns into a confrontational pissing contest
Recurring Characters: President Barack Obama, Mitt Tomney, Tagg Romney.
Transcript
Montage
Bruno Mars’ Monologue
Summary: Bruno Mars quells concerns about his hosting abilities by singing a song.
Chanel No. 5
Summary: Brad Pitt (Taran Killam) makes a rambling endorsement for Chanel No. 5.
Recurring Characters: Brad Pitt.
Transcript
Haters
Summary: Sunny Taylor Tompkins (Cecily Strong) introduces deadbeat guests that her audience love to hate on no matter what.
Taco Bell
Summary: Brad Pitt (Taran Killam) makes a rambling endorsement for Taco Bell.
Recurring Characters: Brad Pitt.
Pandora Internet Radio
Summary: When various station feeds falter, it’s up to intern Devin (Bruno Mars) to perform live imitations of various singers.
Sad Mouse
Summary: Dejected after a couple of personal tragedies, Mark (Bruno Mars) tries to deliver happiness while standing on the city streets dressed as a large mouse.
Transcript
Bruno Mars performs “Locked Out Of Heaven”
Weekend Update with Seth Meyers
Summary: Seth Meyers offer up his list of Debate Dos & Don’ts. Stefon (Bill Hader) outlines the hottest places to celebrate Halloween in New York City.
Recurring Characters: Stefon.
Transcript
Merryville Haunted Castle
Summary:
Recurring Characters:
Transcript
Franklin’s Dog Condoms
Summary: Brad Pitt (Taran Killam) makes a rambling endorsement for Franklin’s Dog Condoms.
Recurring Characters: Brad Pitt.
Yeti Point
Summary: Lodge clerk (Bruno Mars) warns Mr. (Jason Sudeikis) and Mrs. Johnson (Vanessa Bayer) to beware the yeti who roams the woods.
Jonathan Zizmor M.D.
Summary: Brad Pitt (Taran Killam) makes a rambling endorsement for Jonathan Zizmor M.D.
Recurring Characters: Brad Pitt.
Bruno Mars performs “Young Girls”
Donkey Punch The Ballot!
Summary: DJ Supersoak (Jason Sudeikis) and Lil’ Blaster (Nasim Pedrad) promote the Election Day festival that features wild bands and a Fake Hawaiian ID booth.
Recurring Characters: DJ Super Soak, Lil Blaster, MC George Castanza, Ass Dan, Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
Transcript
Goodnights
Transcript
Dress Rehearsal Cuts
