Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 39: Episode 7
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Air Date:Host:Musical Guest:Special Guests:Cameos:Bit Players:
November 23rd 2013
Josh Hutcherson
HAIM
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Piers Morgan Tonight
Summary: Piers Morgan (Taran Killam) discusses George Zimmerman’s recent borderline criminal activity.
Recurring Characters: Piers Morgan, George Zimmer.
Montage
Josh Hutcherson’s Monologue
Summary: Josh Hutcherson endures the cast’s desire to pit him in their own version of “The Hunger Games”.
Transcript
Girlfriends Talk Show
Summary: Morgan (Aidy Bryant) acts nervous when Kyra (Cecily Strong) invites her secret crush Trevor Masterson (Josh Hutcherson) to co-host the show.
Recurring Characters: Kyra, Morgan.
Transcript
Office Boss
Summary: New company employee Craig (Josh Hutcherson) meets his boss Richard Patterson (Beck Bennett), who hs the intelligence of a man yet the body of a baby.
Transcript
Matchbox 3
Summary: Trio of subway performers (Kenan Thompson, Jay Pharoah, Josh Hutcherson) specialize in the art of performing limited dance moves in crowded subway cars.
Transcript
HAIM performs “The Wire”
Weekend Update with Seth Meyers & Cecily Strong
Summary: The Worst Lady on an Airplane (Aidy Bryant) offers tips on how to behave annoyingly during holiday plane trips.
Transcript
80’s Song
Summary: Veronica (Vanessa Bayer) meets her friend’s brother Devon (Josh Hutcherson), which sparks a romantic conversation via the lip-synched lyrics of “Our Love” by The Outfield.
Transcript
Best Buy Firing
Summary: When the manager (Josh Hutcherson) at Best Buy calls a meeting to announce employee layoffs, Niff (Bobby Moynihan) and Dana (Cecily Strong) assume they’re first in line on the chopping block and proceed to call out their co-workers for being a bunch of lame-asses.
Recurring Characters: Niff, Dana, Jessica McClure.
Transcript
Dancing
Summary:
HAIM performs “Don’t Save Me”
Animal Hospital
Summary: Bored nurses (Josh Hutcherson, Kate McKinnon, Cecily Strong) at an animal hospital tell all the owners that their pets have died.
Transcript
Investigative Report
Summary: Investigative reporter Winston Sam Bass (Mike O’Brien) and his brothe Lance Sam Bass (Josh Hutcherson) ask bugs why they’re always running so fast.
Transcript
Thanksgiving Guest
Summary: Trey’s (Josh Hutcherson) family is surprised when he brings his live turkey girlfriend (Vanessa Bayer) home for Thanksgiving dinner.
Transcript
Goodnights
Transcript
Dress Rehearsal Cuts
