SNL Transcripts: Andy Samberg: 05/17/14: Legolas from ‘The Hobbit’ Tries to Order at Taco Bell


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 39: Episode 21

13u: Andy Samberg / St. Vincent

Legolas from ‘The Hobbit’ Tries to Order at Taco Bell

Legolas…..Andy Samberg
Employee…..Jay Pharoah
Gimli…..Bobby Moynihan

Announcer: And now, Legolas from The Hobbit tries to order at Taco Bell.

Legolas: I have no memory of this place. Good Day!

Employee: Welcome to Taco Bell. May I take your order, please?

Legolas: A red sun rises. Blood has been spilled this night.

Employee: No man. It’s just sauce over there.

Legolas: I’ll take two beef chalupas.

Employee: Two beef chalupas for this hippie lady.

Legolas: You have my thanks. But I cannot linger. How’s the Cool Ranch Doritos Taco Loco? Is that good? I keep hearing about it.

Gimli: Just save some for me!

Legolas: Gimli, you’ve returned!

Gimli: That’s right old friend. Hi, I’ll have a cheesy chicken burrito as well as, one of everything else on the menu, please. Ha, ha, ha! Funny! I thought I would never dine with an elf.

Legolas: Then how about dining with a friend?

Gimli: Aye! That I can do. Ha ha ha!

Employee: (looking at the camera) White people.

Announcer: This has been Legolas from The Hobbit tries to order at Taco Bell.

Submitted by: Raul Gonzalez

SNL Transcripts

How useful was this post?

Click on a star to rate it!

Average rating 0 / 5. Vote count: 0

No votes so far! Be the first to rate this post.

Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King is directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him nine Emmys and thirteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Mr. King is also the creative director of Broadway Worldwide which brings theatrical events to theaters. The company has produced Smokey Joe’s Café; Putting It Together with Carol Burnett; Jekyll & Hyde; and Memphis, all directed by Mr. King. He completed the screen capture of Broadway's Romeo & Juliet in 2013. - LinkedIn

Notify of
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments