Jim Carrey
[Starts with a man driving a car. It’s a car commercial.]
Jim Carrey: Sometimes you gotta go back to actually move forward. And I don’t mean go back and reminisce or chase ghost. I mean, take a big step back. Like, go from winning an Oscar to doing a car commercial. My agent was like, “I could understand if you did this right after the Lincoln Lawyer, that would have made sense.” But you don’t Lincoln coz it makes sense. You do it coz you love it, or coz you’re an Uber driver. I feel safe in here, to drive around all night long. Contemplating the important questions alive, who am I? Why am I here? When I’m done rolling up this booger, should I eat it or throw it out the window? Feels good. Like a tiny little tennis ball. Ah there, little fella.
Why do I drive Lincoln? Why does anybody do anything? We’re just bugs on a rock and a void. We were a mistake. Life, earth, I believe it is each man’s duty to correct the mistake the nature made. Extinguish mankind like pathetic match that it is.
[Cut to the back seat. There is a boy and a girl.]
Son: Dad, are you okay?
[1 looks back]
Jim Carrey: I’m super good, bud.
[Cut to the kids]
Daughter: You’re going 5 miles an hour.
[Cut to 1]
Jim Carrey: Not bad for a Lincoln. [1 looks at the rear view mirror] Who’s kids are these? And how did they get on Lincoln?
