Danny DaVito… Bobby Moynihan

George Clooney…Taran Killam

[Starts with a message video]

Written: George Clooney & Danny DaVito for NESPRESSO.

[Cut to film studio. People are in line for coffee.]

Danny DaVito: What’s that?

George Clooney: Nespresso.

Danny DaVito: Is that coffee?

George Clooney: Yeah.

[George Clooney walks away]

[Cut to George Clooney with his colleagues having his Nespresso. Danny DaVito walks in.]

Danny DaVito: I want in.

George Clooney: You ready?

Danny DaVito: For what? I just want a cup of coffee.

George Clooney: So it begins.

[Cut to a tailor shop. Danny DaVito is getting his measurements while George Clooney is sitting and having coffee.]

Danny DaVito: Hey, can I ask you something? What’s happening right now? Where are we? Why am I getting fitted for a suit.

George Clooney: Patience.

Danny DaVito: I just don’t get the logic. How does this help me get coffee?

[George Clooney raises his glass]

That’s not an answer.

[Cut to Danny DaVito and George Clooney in bar. George Clooney is smelling the scent of his wine.]

Is this a prank or something?

[George Clooney makes a face]

Just shut up.

[Cut to Danny DaVito and George Clooney having sushi]

What? Now we’re eating sushi? It’s like, the one thing that doesn’t go with coffee. We just went to an Italian restaurant. I’ve had like, three meals today. I’m so confused.

[Cut to Danny DaVito and George Clooney looking at an art at art gallery]

And how do we know each other? We in Batman together? No, right?

[George Clooney shakes his head no.]

Man was Keaton. Then, why me and you? I just–

[George Clooney just gestures showing his two index fingers]

[Danny DaVito mocking George Clooney] Dang! What is that? Say something.

[Cut to Danny DaVito suited in a tailor shop talking on the phone]

Honey, I think there’s something with Clooney. We’ve been driving around aimlessly for hours. He’s barely speaking to me. And he won’t let me have any coffee.

George Clooney: You’re ready.

Danny DaVito: Okay, whatever you say, judge.

[drums rolling]

[Cut to Danny DaVito and George Clooney walking on the street near studio. They’re both wearing suits.]

[Cut to Danny DaVito getting his cup of coffee]


[A woman comes in wearing a beaver outfit. She opens the helmet and she’s an attractive woman.]

Kate: Is that coffee?

[Cut to Danny DaVito looking at the camera]

Danny DaVito: It’s Nespresso.

[music playing and Danny DaVito takes a sip]

[Danny DaVito spits out the coffee]

It’s not bad.

Male voice: Nespresso. Whaaaat?

Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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