Weekend Update


Colin Jost

Michael Che

[Starts with Michael Che in his news set. There’s a picture of a magazine with Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson on front page at right top corner.]

Michael Che: People magazine’s sexiest man alive is Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson. Yeah. He once again beat his long time rival Dwayne ‘The Scissors’ Johnson. [Picture changes to The Rock with mustache] [Cut to Colin Jost. There’s a picture of Barack Obama at left top corner.]

I am so proud of that joke. [laughing]

Colin Jost: President Obama this week criticized the spread of fake news on social media. But can we really trust a guy who is also a secret gay alien? [picture changes to a fake news article as ‘Obama is secret gay alien’.] [Picture changes to a millipede]

Scientists have discovered a species of millipede that have four of it’s legs modified to act as penises. And we actually have some footage of the millipede. Let’s take a look.

[Cut to a video of millipede walking. There’s edited sound of a man saying “ouch, ouch, ouch” when the millipede is walking.] [Cut to Michael Che. There’s a picture of New Balance logo at right top corner.]

Michael Che: A Neo-nazi group has declared New Balance, the official shoes of white people. But if New Balances are the official shoes of white people, then what are crocs?

[Picture changes to a horse and a lion]

A man on an African safari fell off a horse while being chased by a lion. “Well, that was a close one”, said the horse.

[Cut to Colin Jost. There’s a picture of tinder logo at left top corner.]

Colin Jost: The dating app tinder announced their new feature this week with give users 37 different gender identity options. It’s called, “Why democrats lost the election?”

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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