Gene… Kenan Thompson
Gemma… Cecily Strong
Sleigh man… Mikey Day[Starts with a sign board ‘Free Winter Sleigh Ride’]
Leslie Jones: This is so romantic. [Cut to Sleigh on the snow. There’s Sleigh man, Leslie and Gene] What a great idea, Gene. A winter sleigh ride. [Cut to Leslie and Gene] It would be a great place to propose to somebody.
Gene: Oh, well. You’re hilarious. That’s why I’m really starting to like you.
Leslie Jones: Well, I love you, and I’m ready.
Speaker 3: [Cut to Sleigh on the snow.] Oh, honey, look, this sleigh has a room.
Kyle Mooney: After you, my lady, please.
Jason Momoa: [Jason and Cecily comes in] Oh, my god! Gene, are you jerking me [Cut to Jason and Cecily] off right now? Is that you?
Leslie Jones: [Cut to Leslie and Gene] Who is that Gene?
Gene: I have no idea.
Jason Momoa: [Cut to Jason and Cecily] Baby, look that’s Gene. Man, I’m blown seeing you! Come on, get out of here! [Jason pulls other passengers out]
Kyle Mooney: Excuse me, we waited an hour in line. You’re a jerk, sir!
Speaker 3: Wow, I wish that was the first time that happened. [Jason and Cecily gets in the sleigh]
Gemma: Hi, I’m Gemma. Nice to meet you. Happy Christmas and all that.
Jason Momoa: Hey, don’t talk like that when I’m wearing these jeans, they’re too tight for that accent. You know what I’m saying Gene? [Cut to Leslie and Gene] Sleigh man, let’s go!
Sleigh Man: [Cut to everybody] Yup.
Gene: I’m sorry, who are you?
Gemma: I’m Gemma, I’m British. [Cut to Gemma and Jason] I got a brand new vagina today.
Leslie Jones: [Cut to Leslie and Gene] What? You got a new vagina today?
Gemma: [Cut to Gemma and Jason] Well, we did it in Thailand, flew in this morning. Whatever the time difference is, I guess I got it tomorrow.
Jason Momoa: Merry Christmas to me, Today or tomorrow. Right, Gene! We’re gonna rock! Thank you, Thailand.
Gemma: Don’t make me laugh, it will come loose.
Gene: [Cut to Leslie and Gene] I’m sorry, I’m going to say it again, how in the world do I know you?
Jason Momoa: [Cut to Gemma and Jason] Dude, it’s your boy. I carried you down from that zip line after you got too scared to go, remember that?
Gene: [Cut to Leslie and Gene] I wasn’t scared.
Jason Momoa: [Cut to Gemma and Jason] Well, you were crying and you were hanging on my back like a little koala.
Leslie Jones: [Cut to Leslie and Gene] That sounds so cute, Gene. I’d carry you like a koala if you wanted.
Gene: Oh, That’s nice.
Gemma: [Cut to Gemma and Jason] It’s nice to actually love your brother.
Leslie Jones: [Cut to Leslie and Gene] What? You think he’s my brother?
Gemma: [Cut to Gemma and Jason] Isn’t it sweet, babe?
Jason Momoa: Oh, my lord. That accent, that little tiny hand on my shoulder. Oh man. I’m going to take that blanket of yours because I’m building a Christmas tree over here. You know what I’m talking about? Your sister knows what I’m talking about.
Leslie Jones: [Cut to Leslie and Gene] I’m not his sister. I’m his fiancée.
Leslie Jones: Well, practically speaking.
Gene: Let’s take it day by day.
Leslie Jones: You better not be wasting my time.
Gemma: [Cut to Gemma and Jason] You got to think about yourself first, you know. Your brother don’t own you. Just remember that. Girl power.
Jason Momoa: Speaking of girl power, my girl gives me that kind of power. [Cut to everybody. Jason starts to rock the sleigh] When the sleigh’s rocking don’t you come knocking. Am I right, Gene? Am I right?
Sleigh Man: Sir, please stop rocking the sleigh, it’s not safe and you’re spooking the horse, sir!
Gemma: Hey, don’t you look into my eyes. Don’t even look you look at my girl.
Sleigh Man: I’m actually asexual. Not that anyone ever cares or asks.
Gemma: Babe, I love your anger.
Jason Momoa: Oh my god, I almost forgot the best part. My girl’s a singer.
Gene: [Cut to Leslie and Gene] What?
Gemma: [Cut to Gemma and Jason] He said I’m a singer!
Jason Momoa: Gene, you and your sister’s ears are about to climax together. Her new Christmas album. It is dope, it’s all about hope. Do it, baby?
Gemma: [Gene starts to sing] Lights flashing, beat sounding us…[Jason starts dancing rocking the sleigh again] that’s when you see him… dancing in the corner… and now it’s knocking in the corner
Sleigh Man: Sir, you have to stop rocking the sleigh. The horses are being lifted off the ground. The hooves are in mid air.
Gemma: Hey, just like real reindeer do, right? They got their hooves up in the air, don’t they? ♪ POP, POP, POP, POP, POP, POP, POP
Gene: [Cut to Leslie and Gene] Alright, I can’t take anymore! Should we jump?
Jason Momoa: [Cut to Gemma and Jason] Yeah, let’s do it buddy. Gene, come on, let’s get ready. [Cut to everybody] Gene’s sister, let’s do it! One, two, sixty. [Jason jumps] WOO!
Gemma: Oh, he’s such a nug.
Gene: Can you sing me a song? Of course!
Leslie Jones and Gene: ♪We wish you a Merry Christmas
We wish you a Merry Christmas
Gemma: I know this song.
Leslie Jones and Gene and Gemma: And a Happy New Year.