Good Morning Goomah | Season 44 Episode 7

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Gina Barbarosa… Kate McKinnon

Sandy Dentista… Claire Foy

Marian Perillo… Aidy Bryant

Tony… Pete Davidson

[TV show intro playing]

Narrator: You’re watching Staten Island cable.

[Cut to Gina and Sandy sitting on a couch of their set]

Gina Barbarosa: It’s 8 AM in Woodrow, Staten Island which means you’re watching “Good morning Goomah.” As always, I’m Gina Barbarosa.

Sandy Dentista: And I am waiting for him to call. I kid. I’m Sandy Dentista.

Gina Barbarosa: And to all the Goomahs watching at home, welcome to the worst month of the year.

Sandy Dentista: December. O

Gina Barbarosa: The holidays.

Sandy Dentista: When he has to see the family.

Gina Barbarosa: Because Christmas is for wives but you know in your heart he loves you just as much because say it with me—

Gina Barbarosa and Sandy Dentista: You do things the wife would never do!

Sandy Dentista: Look what he got me. Is that just fabulous?

Gina Barbarosa: Oh, my god. Oh, my god.

Sandy Dentista: He says it was an apartment ring because I’m not allowed to wear it outside of the apartment.

Gina Barbarosa: Oh, okay. So trust me, today is jewelry, tomorrow he’s going to be eating with you in public. I can’t. I can’t

Sandy Dentista: Okay, so now it’s time for an advertisement.

Gina Barbarosa: Okay, let’s get going. Today’s episode is brought to you by Virginia slim’s extra long.

Sandy Dentista: They’re 30% longer because what do you have to do all day?

Gina Barbarosa: Okay, we have a real exciting one today. [Someone presses the door buzzer] Okay, here we go.

Sandy Dentista: Every time.

Speaker on the door: Hello! Leave my husband alone. Do you hear me?

Sandy Dentista: Just got to wait it out.

Speaker on the door: Is this the super? There is a whore living in this building. Dentista, Sandy, whore! 2C, whore.

Gina Barbarosa: Remember, he has to go home to that.

Sandy Dentista: Please, I’m immune. He still uses condoms with that, that one. Oh, the storm passed.

Gina Barbarosa: We’re fine.

Sandy Dentista: Okay, our first guests is Bobby Valico’s her Goomah. Marian Perillo.

[Marian Perillo walks in with a little puppy]

Marian Perillo: Oh, hey sandy, hey Gina.

Sandy Dentista: Hey! Oh, nice little dog. It’s nice to have you on. I hear Bobby’s very happy. But I have to ask you, what happened to the old Goomah?

[Cut to Marian Perillo]

Marian Perillo: Oh well, you didn’t hear it from me, but she’s called the house.

[Cut to Gina and Sandy]

Gina Barbarosa: No! Was she sick?

Sandy Dentista: When your man gets home before things get romantic, does he say hello?

[Cut to Marian Perillo]

Marian Perillo: Never. No, I never get a hello.

[Cut to Gina and Sandy]

Gina Barbarosa: And by romantic, we do mean getting pulverized from the back.

Sandy Dentista: Of course, the only way.

[Cut to Marian Perillo]

Marian Perillo: Yes, of course, face to face is for—

[Cut to everybody]

Everybody: The wives!

Gina Barbarosa: Oh, my god!

[Cut to Gina and Sandy]

Sandy Dentista: Oh, my god! Tony is here.

Gina Barbarosa: Oh my god. I told you he’d come. Oh my god.

[Tony comes in from the door. Sandy stands up and walks behind Tony]

Sandy Dentista: Hey, Tony darling! So good to see you, baby cakes.

Tony: You got orange juice?

[Cut to Sandy and Tony]

Sandy Dentista: Of course I do Tony darling. It’s on the table.

Tony: On the table? So it’s hot! You got a hot orange juice. You don’t have cold orange juice? You don’t have ice cubes in it? What the hell?

Sandy Dentista: No Tony. Please, Tony.

Tony: No Tony this, no Tony that! How about this, no Tony!

[Tony walks to the door]

Sandy Dentista: What I got to do. All I do is love you.

Tony: Then get me some cold orange juice! [Tony throws some money to Sandy and storms out]

Sandy Dentista: Why are you so perfect?

Gina Barbarosa: [Cut to Gina] I mean And that’s all for this week on “Good Morning Goomah.”  [Sandy comes and sits beside Gina] I’m Gina Barbarosa, and remember, wait it out.

Sandy Dentista: He’s only with her for the kids.

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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Miffy Beaverton
Miffy Beaverton
1 year ago

It’s like Diet Sopranos!

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