Kit Harington Monologue | Season 44 Episode 17

Kit Harington

Emilia Clarke

Rose Leslie

John Bradley

Night Walker… Pete Davidson

[Starts with SNL monologue intro] [Band is playing music]

Narrator: Ladies and gentlemen, Kit Harington.

[Cheers and applause] [Kit Harington walks in the door and to the stage]

Kit Harington: Thank you, thank you. Thank you, thank you, [Cheers and applause] thank you very much. My name is Kit Harington. Although many of you do probably know me as Jon Snow. [Cheers and applause] I’ve just shaved my beard, so this is more a kind of prepubescent Jon Snow. [Laughter] This is Jon Snow if he suddenly played for the Yankees. [Laughter] I have no idea what that means. [Laughter] The writers told me to say it, so you guys probably know what it means.

Many of you have only seen me in Game of Thrones which is probably a good thing. Some of my other credits include the movie ‘Pompeii’, which somehow prove more of a disaster than the event it was based on. [Laughter] I was also in a movie called ‘Silent Hill: Revelation 3D’. Anyone a fan? No, I didn’t think so. [Laughter]

So, Game of Thrones was obviously huge for me, and I’m very grateful for all the fans. But I got to say after 10 years I’m really excited to see what comes next. And um– Oh! Looks like we’ve got a question.

[Cut to the audience]

Audience: Hey, man, I just wanted to say this is fascinating, dude! Love hearing about the career.

[Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: Oh, thank you.

[Cut to the audience]

A guy from audience: Yeah, so who wins ‘Game of Thrones’?

[Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: I’m sorry, I’m not at liberty to reveal that information.

[Cut to the audience]

A guy from audience: At liberty? Bitch, I didn’t come here for sketches. Who wins ‘Game of Thrones’?

[Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: Yeah, okay! Can we have him removed please?

[Cut to the audience]

A guy from audience: Oh-oh. And you just found yourself in a PR nightmare, man. [Security moves the guy outside] [Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: Look, I’m sorry, I’m not revealing how the show ends.

Emilia Clarke: Well, all right, [Cut to Emilia Clarke] could you just give us a general sense of how it ends? [Cheers and applause] [Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: Wait a second, Amelia, you’re in the show? You know already.

[Cut to Emilia Clarke]

Emilia Clarke: Well, yeah, but I forgot. It’s been so damn long since the last season. Plus a lot of my scenes are talking to a dragon which is just a tennis ball on a green pole. So I have no idea what’s actually happening.

[Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: Well, I’m sorry, you’ll just have to wait and see in a couple of weeks.

[Cut to Emilia Clarke]

Emilia Clarke: All right, fine. Oh, hey! Do you remember in season 6 when we had sex?

[Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: Yes I do.

[Cut to Emilia Clarke]

Emilia Clarke: Did you know they filmed that?

[Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: Okay, any other questions?

Audience: Uh, yeah. [Cut to the audience] Do you think it’s weird that Dumbledore and Grindlewald were hooking up?

[Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: Okay, I think that’s Harry Potter.

[Cut to the audience]

Audience: And what are you?

[Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: Game of Thrones.

[Cut to the audience]

Audience: Oh, let’s get out of here guys.

[Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: Sorry for the confusion.

[Cut to John Bradley]

John Bradley: Hey, Kit. [Cheers and applause] [Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: Hey, John, how are you?

[Cut to John Bradley]

John Bradley: I’m good. I was just wondering, do you know what happens to Samwell Tarley?

Kit Harington: You don’t know what happens to your own character?

[Cut to John Bradley]

John Bradley: They only let me see two pages of the script. My character says “Arghhh”.

Kit Harington: What did the script say before that?

[Cut to John Bradley]

John Bradley: Dragon opens mouth.

[Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: That doesn’t sound too good, mate. But I can’t  tell you more than that. I’m sorry.

[Cut to John Bradley]

John Bradley: Oh, that’s okay. Kit, one more thing. Do you think we’ll still hang out after the show ends? Like best friends?

[Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: Sure, John.

[Cut to John Bradley]

John Bradley: What about Tuesday at 6 AM?

[Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: I’m actually busy on Tuesday.

[Cut to John Bradley]

John Bradley: Wow. You’ve changed.

[Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: Anymore questions?

[Cut to Night Walker in the audience]

Night Walker: I just need to know, do people hate me? Because it really feels like they hate me.

[Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: I mean, yeah, you’re the night king. Everyone you touch turns into an ice zombie.

[Cut to Night Walker]

Night Walker: Ah, okay, my bad. But hey, do you think after this we’ll still be friends?

[Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: We were never friends.

[Cut to Night Walker in the audience]

Night Walker: Samwell Tarley was right. You have changed. [Night Walker leaves the room] [Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: Okay, I think we’ve had all the questions for now.

Rose Leslie: No, wait, wait. [Cut to Rose Leslie] I have a question. [Cheers and applause] [Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: My god. Rose. This is my wife, Rose. We actually met on the show.

[Cut to Rose Leslie]

Rose Leslie: Yeah, they know. They know. But I need to as you something, Kit.

[Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: I’m sorry, honey, I can’t even tell you how ‘Game of Thrones’ ends.

[Cut to Rose Leslie]

Rose Leslie: Oh, no, I don’t care about that. I’m not a nerd. No, my question is what are we going to do for money now? I mean, we didn’t save anything. And you kept telling me, “Oh, I’m the king of the North, we can order Uber eats every night.”

[Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: Honey, don’t worry, we’ll be okay. I’ll make my jewelry and you have your little songs.

[Cut to Rose Leslie]

Rose Leslie: Oh, okay, honey. I love you. One more question. How soon can you grow back that beard?

[Cut to Kit Harington]

Kit Harington: I love you too. So we’ve got a great show for you tonight. [Night Walker  come to the stage and plays with Kit Harington] Sara Bareilles is here. Stick around. We’ll be right back.

 

Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King is directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him nine Emmys and thirteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Mr. King is also the creative director of Broadway Worldwide which brings theatrical events to theaters. The company has produced Smokey Joe’s Café; Putting It Together with Carol Burnett; Jekyll & Hyde; and Memphis, all directed by Mr. King. He completed the screen capture of Broadway's Romeo & Juliet in 2013. - LinkedIn

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