Network Meeting | Season 44 Episode 16

Jussie Smollett… Chris Redd

Lee Daniels… Kenan McKinnon

Manager… Sandra Oh

Kate McKinnon

Ego Nwodim

Mikey Day

[Starts with meeting hall of Empire Fox]

Kate McKinnon: Look, the bottom line is, we don’t want to work with your client anymore.

Manager: Just give Jussie another chance.

[Cut to Mikey, Kate and Ego]

Ego Nwodim: Why? He doesn’t care about this job anymore.

Kate McKinnon: He’s two hours late for this meeting.

Mikey Day: I mean, not to mention, what he’s already put us through.

[Cut to manager]

Manager: Jussie Smollett was a victim.

Ego Nwodim: Oh, please!

[Cut to manager and Lee]

Manager: Mr. Daniels. I have represented Jussie his entire career. I am sure there is a very reasonable explanation for he is so late right now.

Lee Daniels: Well I just hope it’s not some crazy excuse.

[Cut to Jussie enters the room]

Jussie Smollett: I’m so sorry I’m late.

Manager: Oh my god. Are you okay?

[Cut to everybody]

Jussie Smollett: Guys, you’re not going to believe what just happened to me.

Ego Nwodim: Not again!

Kate McKinnon: Really?

[Cut to Jussie Smollett]

Jussie Smollett: I know what you’re thinking but it’s not that.

[Cut to Lee Daniels]

Lee Daniels: Okay, so what is it?

[Cut to Jussie and manager]

Jussie Smollett: I got attacked again.

[Cut to Mikey, Kate and Ego]

Kate McKinnon: That’s exactly what we were thinking, Jussie.

[Cut to Jussie and manager]

Jussie Smollett: Oh, okay good, so you believe me.

[Cut to Mikey, Kate and Ego]

Ego Nwodim: No!

Mikey Day: What is wrong with you, man?

[Cut to Jussie Smollett]

Jussie Smollett: I just told you I was attacked.

[Cut to Mikey, Kate and Ego]

Ego Nwodim: He meant mentally, Jussie.

Manager: Mr. Daniels, [Cut to Lee, Jussie and his manager] can I have a word with my Client for a second.

Lee Daniels: Yeah, I think you should.

[Cut to manager and Jussie]

Manager: Jussie–

Jussie Smollett: Don’t worry. I got some hits in too, I’m still the gay Tupac.

Manager: Nobody knows what that means. You can see why this story is hard to believe, right?

Jussie Smollett: Great, my old man doesn’t believe me. [Jussie looks at the bag in his hand] Wait, what the –

Manager: Jussie, what is that?

Jussie Smollett: I think it’s a bag of clues?

Manager: No, Jussie, don’t.

Jussie Smollett: Hang on. Look guys, the killer left me a bunch of clues.

[Cut to Mikey and Kate]

Kate McKinnon: What killer?

Mikey Day: You’re still alive, Jussie.

[Cut to manager and Jussie]

Jussie Smollett: It’s only because I fought back because I’m the gay Mike Tyson.

[Cut to Mikey, Kate and Ego]

Ego Nwodim: You see what I mean, we can’t keep this guy around.

[Cut to manager and Jussie]

Jussie Smollett: Wait, let’s just see what’s in here first. Crest white strips. Wow, what do you think that means?

[Cut to Ego Nwodim]

Ego Nwodim: I don’t know. Maybe it’s because you’re black.

[Cut to manager and Jussie]

Jussie Smollett: Yo, you think it’s racial? Damn!

Manager: Jussie, please, stop.

Jussie Smollett: Shh, there’s more. [Taking letters ‘K’ out from the bag] A ‘K’. Another ‘K’. Three ‘K’s. Like what do you think that means?

[Cut to Mikey and Kate]

Mikey Day: It’s probably the Ku Klux Klan. Jussie.

[Cut to manager and Jussie]

Jussie Smollett: Really? I thought that was a myth.

[Cut to Lee Daniels]

Lee Daniels: Jussie!

[Cut to manager and Jussie]

Jussie Smollett: Hang on, there’s more stuff. Oh, a receipt, I need that. Car keys, definitely need those. Oh, a teletubby. And it’s the gay one!

[Cut to Lee Daniels]

Lee Daniels: Jussie, this is absolutely ridiculous.

[Cut to Jussie Smollett]

Jussie Smollett: But, I’m telling the truth, I was attacked.

[Cut to Kate McKinnon]

Kate McKinnon: Okay, I guess we should just call the police then.

[Cut to Jussie Smollett]

Jussie Smollett: No, no, no, no, they said I can never call again. That’s part of the deal.

[Cut to Lee Daniels]

Lee Daniels: Jussie, you know we’ve got to fire you, right?

[Cut to Jussie Smollett]

Jussie Smollett: What? You can’t fire me. I made this show, man! I am the gay Lee Daniels.

[Cut to Lee Daniels]

Lee Daniels: Jussie, I am the gay Lee Daniels.

[Cut to Jussie Smollett]

Jussie Smollett: Right, I guess it’s just [Cut to manager and Jussie] you and me then.

Manager: No, I’m firing you.

Jussie Smollett: Okay, fine. I guess I will just be on my way then. [Jussie Smollett leaves the room] [Cut to everybody]

Lee Daniels: Oh, that was pretty rough.

Kate McKinnon: Yikes. [Cut to Mikey, Kate and Ego] Well, you did the right thing, Lee.

Ego Nwodim: Yeah. You definitely did.

[Cut to manager]

Manager: No, I just hope he gets the help he needs.

[Jussie Smollet enters the room again with a neck bandage on]

Jussie Smollett: Guys, oh, my god.

[Cut to everybody]

Lee Daniels: Oh, come on man!

Jussie Smollett: You’re not going to believe what happened to me this time!

Lee Daniels: Jussie, go home! Just go home!

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