Brother… Kyle Mooney
Sister… Chloe Fineman
Dad… Beck Bennett
Mom… Kristen Wiig
[Starts with kids waking their parents up in the morning of Christmas.]
Speaker 1: Mom, dad, get up!
Speaker 2: Come on, you guys. Wake up. Wake up.
[musicplaying]
All: It’s Christmas morning. Let’s open up our presents.
BROTHER: Well, I got a Nerf gun!
SISTER: I got a hat!
DAD: I got an autographed baseball bat!
BROTHER: I got a telescope!
SISTER: I got a globe!
DAD: I got a watch!
MOM: And I got a robe!
BROTHER: I got Hulk hands!
DAD: I got a tie!
SISTER: And I got a copy of The Catcher in the Rye!
BROTHER: I got a drum set!
SISTER: I got a phone!
DAD: I got a pen!
MOM: And I got a robe
DAD: I got an outdoor pizza oven!
BROTHER: I got a cameo from McLovin!
SISTER: I got a hoverboard!
BROTHER: I got a drone!
DAD: I got a laptop!
MOM: And I got a robe
Thanks for the robe, it’s really really nice
Thanks for the robe, guys, this is great
BROTHER: I got headphones!
SISTER: I got a wig!
BROTHER AND SISTER: We got the piano from Big!
DAD: I got a vintage pinball machine!
MOM: And I’m gonna make us breakfast!
In my brand new robe which I love so much
It’s really really soft! Oh, it’s on sale
SISTER: I got a sword!
DAD: I got shades!
BROTHER AND SISTER: We got pairs of rollerblades!
BROTHER: I got a Lego Millennium Falcon!
MOM: And I burned my arm in the oven
It hurt pretty bad, but I didn’t even scream
‘Cause I keep the pain inside of me
ALL: More and more presents
Let’s open up our stockings
BROTHER: Mine has a set of travel games!
SISTER: And mine is stuffed with candy canes!
DAD: Mine has a bottle of nice cologne!
MOM: And mine is completely empty
Just a big, flat sock with nothing inside
I only hang it up ’cause it looks kinda weird
If it’s missing in our pictures
DAD: Hold on now, what’s this I see?
SISTER: A few more presents beneath the tree!
BROTHER: Looks like someone’s got a big surprise
MOM: Oh, you guys really didn’t need to get me–
BROTHER, SISTER, AND DAD: It’s presents for the dog!
BROTHER: He got a bone and a squeaky toy!
DAD: And peanut butter treats
BROTHER AND SISTER: ‘Cause he’s a good boy!
SISTER: So many presents, but he deserves it!
BROTHER AND SISTER: And he got a robe!
BROTHER, SISTER, AND DAD: It’s Christmas morning! Let’s take a family picture!
MOM: John, I don’t have any makeup on. I was up until 4 in the —
BROTHER, SISTER, AND DAD: What a great picture! Let’s post it on the internet!
Male voice: Your mom does everything for your family. This year, get her more than one present. Moms like stuff, too
BROTHER: Who touched my piano?
MOM: [yelling] It was an accident!
