Ted… Mikey Day
Boss… Kenan Thompson[Starts with a kid making a YouTube video.]
Brandon: What’s up, YouTube. It’s your boy, Brandon. So, I have a corny ass dad.[He shoots his dad with an airgun.]
Ted: Ouch! Brandon?
Brandon: So, I’ve been pranking him during quarantine, and here are my favorite ones.[Brandon is putting draw pins on the toilet seat.]
Oh, this is gonna hurt so bad. Put thumb tacks oh his toilet seat.[Cut to Ted getting in the toilet. He takes the seat. He jumps off and drops his phone.]
Ted: Ah! My phone. Of course, it cracked. Of course, it cracked. [He kneels down to get the pins out of his butt.] Okay. [grunting] More. More. Why so many? Why so many? I’m bleeding. I’m bleeding. And there’s like, four in the toilet. Wonderful.
Brandon: Changed dad’s every contact’s name in his phone to Gigi Hadid.
Gigi Hadid. Gigi Hadid. Gigi Hadid. Gigi Hadid. [phone ringing] Dad, it’s Gigi Hadid.
Ted: [yelling] You’re laughing and it’s my work. I don’t know who to call because I don’t know their numbers. They all say Gigi Hadid.
Brandon: Why do you hate Gigi Hadid?
Ted: Brandon, I don’t hate Gigi Hadid. I wish her the best.
Brandon: Why do you hate women?
Ted: I don’t hate women.[Brandon is laughing]
Brandon: Bruh. these jump scares tho.
Ted: Brandon, wake up. Remote school time. Just because– [When dad takes the blanket off, his son is wearing a scary mask, so he gets scared and jumps away. He falls hard.] [Brandon is laughing]
Brandon: Changed his Zoom background before a meeting with his boss.[Cut to Ted and his boss on Zoom. Ted’s background is a girl in her bikini at the beach.]
Boss: Um, Ted. You mind telling me why your zoom background is a picture of my teenage daughter in a bathing suit?
Ted: I have no idea, Pat.
Boss: Shut up.
Ted: Brandon! I don’t want that there. [pointing at the background]
Boss: Get your finger off of her. Don’t you touch her. You don’t touch her.
Brandon: Thanks for watching. Peace.