Digital Exclusive- Message to the Girls

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Aiden… Aidy Bryant

Kurt… Kate McKinnon

[Starts with a video bumper]

Female voice: A message to the girls from the goys.

[Cut to two guys]

Aiden: What the hell is up, girls? It’s your boys, Aiden..

Kurt: And Kurt. Tonight is the best night of your life, Prom. Or at least it was.

Aiden: We should be in a hotel ball room right now making you feel like a queen.

Kurt: But unfortunately for cupid, prom got canceled coz of the Qdoba virus.

Aiden: Since we can’t be there to shower you in admirances, we thought we’d take you to prom in your fantasy.

Kurt: And tell you what would have gone down if we were there to put it down.

Aiden: 6 PM.

Kurt: Pictures. First up, I will show up 30 minutes early with my entire family.

Aiden: I will present you with a refrigerated corsage made entirely of 100% baby’s breath. That’s the breath of a baby, girl.

Kurt: I will rent a tux from a Halloween website.

Aiden: We can take 3,000 pictures next to your neighbor’s fancy shrub and my hands, they’re gonna sweat so much that the back of your dress is gonna change color, girl.

Kurt: 6:45.

Aiden: Limo time.

Kurt: I will pay for my whole portion of limo and half of your’s.

Aiden: I of course will sit front where there’s a seatbelt and I will chat with the driver. It seems like it would be hard to drive around the corners with the limo.

Kurt: 7:23.

Aiden: We enter the dance.

Kurt: You walk off to be with and talk to girls. I will be with my guys. Twice through the night, I will approach you and then leave.

Aiden: Mr. Chadman said we’d make a great pair. I don’t know if you’ve heard that but it’s actually something to think about.

Kurt: Our prom is at the Aviation Museum. I was actually on the committee to help select a theme. WWII.

Aiden: And ooh, girl. If we were at prom, we’d dance like this. [dancing]

Kurt: And like this.

Aiden: Probably some of this.

Kurt: And of course, this. [dabs]

Aiden: 10:15.

Kurt: Make out time. When it’s time to kiss, I’ll become distant and sweaty like a first time bank robber.

Aiden: I will have so many altoids throughout the night, you will feel my breath in your eyes.

Kurt: I will close my eyes and fully miss your mouth.

Aiden: I’ll start things off easy by sucking your tongue just the way you like it, girl.

Kurt: At the end of the night, I will pay my friend Chris to give me a hickey.

Aiden: I can’t wait to take you home, to your house. And then I of course will go to my house and explode.

Both: I love you, Brigitte.

Video message: To the graduating class of 2020, from all of us at SNL: Girl, you’re a queen.

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King is directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him nine Emmys and thirteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Mr. King is also the creative director of Broadway Worldwide which brings theatrical events to theaters. The company has produced Smokey Joe’s Café; Putting It Together with Carol Burnett; Jekyll & Hyde; and Memphis, all directed by Mr. King. He completed the screen capture of Broadway's Romeo & Juliet in 2013. - LinkedIn

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