Keith… Beck Bennett
Cara… Ego Nwodim
[Starts with Keith knocking the door]
Keith: Cara, please. Cara, please open the door.
[Cara opens the door]
Cara: I couldn’t have been more clear with you on the phone. I’m done with you, Keith.
Keith: I know. I know. And you should be done with that Keith. That Keith didn’t deserve you. But this Keith, the Keith I am now, he does. I’ve changed, baby. Take me back.
Cara: You’ve changed? How, Keith? How have you changed?
Keith: I quit drinking. I haven’t touched a drop in a month.
Cara: Really?
Keith: Yeah. It was hard but I did it for you.
Cara: I’m glad.
Keith: And no more cocaine.
Cara: What?
Keith: I know. I never thought I could keep that nose blown either, but you gave me strength.
Cara: Sorry. You did coke?
Keith: Just to help keep me off the booze for a couple of years before that too. But those days behind me. No alcohol. No cocaine. No pills. I’m a new man.
Cara: God, Keith! Pills too?
Keith: Yeah. It’s that same old story. You know? Go to the doctor because you’re in pain and they give you these pills to help. But–
Cara: You got hooked.
Keith: Exactly. The next thing I know, I’m taking a fistfuls of Valtrex just to get out of bed in the morning.
Cara: Valtrex is for herpes, Keith. Do you have herpes?
Keith: The old Keith did. But this Keith? Nah. He is good.
Cara: That’s not how herpes works. God! Now I probably have it too.
Keith: Oh baby. You know if you have the kind I have. Plus I always used protection when we were together.
Cara: You never wore a condom.
Keith: But I always had a gun.
Cara: A gun? I’m glad you’re getting your life together but we’re through.
Keith: How can you say that, baby?
Cara: You just told me you have herpes.
Keith: Had. Past tense, baby. Past.
Cara: No. No, no, no, no. I don’t even know why you want to get back together. Half the time we were dating, you were romantically checked out.
Keith: I know. But that’s because, and this is hard for me to say but I had got a little too into porn.
Cara: Wow. That explains a lot.
Keith: Yeah. It’s addictive. I mean it seems harmless at first but then next thing you know, you’re shooting two or three scenes a day and there’s nothing left in the tank when you get home.
Cara: I’m sorry. You were doing porn? Like, having sex with women on the internet?
Keith: What? No. Never.
Cara: Thank god.
Keith: Never women. But baby all that’s behind me now. I’m not that stupid boy I was back then. I’ve grown. I’m a man. I’m Keith8 now.
Cara: You’re Keith8 now?
Keith: Yeah. I’ve changed.
Cara: No. How old were you when we started dating?
Keith: Old enough to know I messed up.
Cara: Oh my god. I’m going to jail.
Keith: Baby, don’t worry about that. Even if the cops found out, I wouldn’t say anything.
Cara: Good. Because–
Keith: [pulls out his gun] I’ll do the hardware do the talking.
Cara: Jesus! Keith! Put that thing away.
Keith: You sound like all those people in the playground. “Put that thing away.”
Cara: You took a gun out in the playground?
Keith: Gun? No. Never a gun.
Cara: What the hell is wrong with you?
Keith: People at the playground said that too.
Cara: Keith!
Keith: Alright. I’ll go. But first, there’s something I should have done a long time ago.
[Keith gets to his knees]
Cara: Oh my god!
[Keith presses the button that’s on his home arrest device]
Keith: I have to press that every hour so they know I’m still wearing it.
Cara: Why do you have that, Keith?
Keith: Because of what I took out of the playground.
Cara: Right.
Keith: It was my penis.
Cara: Yeah. I got that, Keith.
Keith: Look. I know I’m not perfect but you are. And I can’t live my life without you, baby. So, please, take me back.
[Keith and Cara are looking at each other. But then police cars come in.]
Oh, crap! Could you just hand on to this for me for like, a day or two? [handing over all the guns, pills and drugs that Keith has on him to Cara] Thanks. You never saw me, okay? I wasn’t here. Love you.
[Keith runs away]
Cara: He loves me.
