Weekend Update Dr. Wenowdis on Trump’s Televised Health Exam

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Colin Jost

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis… Kate McKinnon

[Starts with Colin Jost in his set]

Colin Jost: Last night, president Trump received a medical evaluation on FOX News. Here to give his second opinion is Weekend Update’s resident medical expert, Dr. Wayne Wenowdis.

[Dr. Wayne Wenowdis slides in] [cheers and applause]

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: Hello. Hello.

Colin Jost: Hello, Dr. Wayne Wenowdis. We know you’re highly respected in your field.

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: Yes, we know this.

Colin Jost: And thank you for helping us make sense of this because having a televised medical exam is highly unusual.

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: Yes. We do know this.

Colin Jost: Right. And on FOX, Trump answered some questions from a doctor.

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: We know this.

Colin Jost: But he still won’t say if he’s had a negative test yet.

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: This, we do not know this.

Colin Jost: So, he might technically still be contageous?

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: We know this.

Colin Jost: But he feels so good, he said, “I may be immune.”

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: [puts his feet on the table] What is this?

Colin Jost: And now, he’s holding rallies.

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: Yeah, who does this? He do this. We know this. We hate this. He do this. We know this.

Colin Jost: I’m sorry, Dr. Wenowdis.

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: Yes.

Colin Jost: Are you saying “We know this”? Or are you just saying your last name?

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: Oh! Okay. ‘Wenowdis’ is Greek. In English, it translates to “We know this.” Like “We’re aware of this.”

Colin Jost: Okay. Okay. I think I got it. Alright. So, is there a risk of Trump infecting more people now that he’s gone back to the White House?

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: Um-hmm. It’s very complicated. How can I say this so you can get it? A room have air, right? We know this. Everybody have a nose. We know this. Everybody’s face, it have a hole. Everybody get the virus. [bangs the table] We know this. Okay.

Colin Jost: Uh-huh. We know this. Yeah. Now, Trump did say he’s gonna give the covid drug he got to everyone who needs it for free. Is that possible or true?

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: No.

Colin Jost: I thought you were gonna say a little bit more. [Dr. Wayne Wenowdis shakes his fingers gesturing no] Okay. Alright. Well, Trump is clearly itching to get back on the campaign trail and I’m just wondering, now he’s planning to hold a rally in Florida on Monday, is it safe for him to go to Florida?

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: Oh, this, we don’t know this.

Colin Jost: Right. Right. Because he still might be contageous?

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: No. Just coz Florida seems like a freaky place.

Colin Jost: Alright. Well, thank you very much for stopping by, Dr. Wenowdis.

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: Oh, no, no, no. While I’m here, I’ll have to give you an exam.

Colin Jost: That’s okay.

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: I gotta take your blood pressure

Colin Jost: That’s okay, doctor. I’m in amazing shape.

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: Yes. We know this. But we’re gonna do it anyway.

Colin Jost: Thank you. Okay.

[Dr. Wayne Wenowdis puts the blood pressure measurer on Colin Jost.]

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: Blood pressure. [Dr. Wayne Wenowdis presses the air blower of the measurer. But it makes the squeak toy noise.] Blood pressure. [Dr. Wayne Wenowdis puts the measurer on Colin Jost’s neck.] Blood pressure. Blood pressure.

Colin Jost: Kate, Kate. Are you okay?

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: I’m obviously not.

Colin Jost: What is going on?

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: I’m sorry. It’s such a crazy time. And this is something I started doing to cope. I have a lot of wigs and mustaches at my disposal. And it’s a nice way to escape. It’s refreshing to play a character who know this.

Colin Jost: Oh god. Okay.

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: It’s like, I mean, who will win the election. We don’t know this. When will the pandemic end, this, we don’t know this. What will happen to the world, we do not know this. But Colin, [squeak toy noise] the one thing that we do know is that– No, we don’t know this.

Colin Jost: Well, listen. I know that it is very stressful. I know this is very hard right now. And I know that a lot of people are being very resilient about it. So, I know even though it doesn’t seem good, don’t worry, we can figure this out, we can do this.

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: We can do what?

Colin Jost: We can do this.

Dr. Wayne Wenowdis: We know this. We know this.

Colin Jost: Dr. Wayne Wenowdis, everyone.

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King is directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him nine Emmys and thirteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Mr. King is also the creative director of Broadway Worldwide which brings theatrical events to theaters. The company has produced Smokey Joe’s Café; Putting It Together with Carol Burnett; Jekyll & Hyde; and Memphis, all directed by Mr. King. He completed the screen capture of Broadway's Romeo & Juliet in 2013. - LinkedIn

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