Weekend Update- New Phillies and Astros Mascots

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Colin Jost

Michael Che

[Starts with Michael Che in his news set. He’s wearing a snapback and has unbuttoned his collar. There’s a picture of new Phillies Mascot.]

Michael Che: The Philadelphia Phillies unveiled the new design for their team masco, the Philly fanatic. While Houston Astros have revealed their new mascot, Chitty the Camera. [looking at Colin Jost and holding his whisky glass] Hey, Chitty, it’s good.

[Cut to Colin Jost. There are pictures of Donald Trump Jr. and a bear at left top corner.]

Colin Jost: Donald Trump Jr. has received a permit to hunt and kill a grizzly bear in Alaska. Not to be outdone, [Picture changes to Eric Trump] Eric Trump made a trap to catch a Charmin bears. [Picture changes to a trap used for insects. The bait is a toilet roll.] [Picture changes to a news article that says “4-year-old finds meth in library book.”]

Florida police are investigating after a 4-year-old boy found meth inside a library book. The book was of course, “The very twitchy catterpillar.”

[Cut to Michael Che. There’s a picture of an event promo at right top corner.]

20,000 high school students in New York city got to see the cast of the broadway hit “To kill a mocking bird” performed at Madison Square Garden. And no surprise, the cast beat the Knicks by 25 points.

[Cut to Colin Jost. There’s a picture of news article that says “Non-Costco members barred from food court” at left top corner.”

Colin Jost: Costco announced that it will start enforcing a policy that bans non-members from eating in their food courts. So, if you’re looking for a new low point in your life, try getting dragged out of Costco foodcourt.

[Cut to Michael Che. There’s a picture of a while male with Christian cross painted on his forehead in black at right top corner.]

Michael Che: This Wednesday was Ash Wednesday. The one day a year Catholics are allowed to do a little bit of black face.

Colin Jost: For Weekend Update, I’m Catholic.

Michael Che: I’m Michael Che. Goodnight.

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King is directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him nine Emmys and thirteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Mr. King is also the creative director of Broadway Worldwide which brings theatrical events to theaters. The company has produced Smokey Joe’s Café; Putting It Together with Carol Burnett; Jekyll & Hyde; and Memphis, all directed by Mr. King. He completed the screen capture of Broadway's Romeo & Juliet in 2013. - LinkedIn

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