Big Boys

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Keke: Winter has arrived, y’all.

Ego: Temperature’s droppin’.

Cecily: And you know what that means.

Punkie: It’s coughing season.

Cecily: That time of year when we find a man to keep us warm through these cold months.

Ego: But not just any man will do.

Cecily: That’s right. We out here lookin’ for some big boys.

SZA: [singing] It’s cuffin’ season
And now we’ve got a reason
To get a big boy, I need a big boy
Give me a big boy (Big, b-big, b-big, big boy)
It’s cuffin’ season
And all the girls are leavin’
To get a big boy (Big boy), I need a big boy (Big boy)
I want a big boy

Keke: I need a big boy w-wit’ polar bear arms
Keeps me warm in a winter snowstorm
Wind chill is bitin’ but his jacket’s unzipped
He bring in my groceries in just one trip

Ego: Till the sun comes back, I need a big boy hottie
Makes his own heat with his big boy body
For the next three months, skinny boys is dead
Forget a six-pack, I need the whole damn keg

Punkie: Big boy w-with a big ole back
A California king, refrigerator stacked
With steaks on steaks on steaks on steaks on steaks
Bu-bu-butter, bacon, cheese, and lasagna in the tray

Cecily: Need an enormous man with an enormous stand
Feeds me snacks with his enormous hands
And I hope he asks me to be his winter-wife
‘Cause messin’ with a big boy will change your life

SZA: It’s cuffin’ season
And all the girls be needin’
I need a big boy, I want a big boy
Give me a big boy

Ego: I need a big boy body, like a bouncer
Big mouth-breather and legs like a monster
Get in the bed and he gonna do me right
And when we all done he gonna snore all night
And then he stops
Did this man just die?

Keke: Anything I need, my big boy got it
If I need a snack, he got Snickers in his pocket

Cecily: Big warm hoodie, yeah, you know I’m gonna rock it
And if we gon’ travel, you know he gon’ put me in first-class
’cause he don’t fit in the back

Punkie: Hey, big boys (Ah, ah)
Go big boys (Ah, ah)
Hey, big boys (Ah, ah)
I like ’em big boys (Ah, ah)
Keke: Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, Punkie, I thought you only liked girls.

Punkie: I love girls, but they can’t keep me warm. I wanna be the little-spoon sometimes. It’s like this.

I been mannin’ up the whole year
Taking care of kids and wife
I mow the lawn, take out the trash
You don’t think that I be tired?
All I do is work and stress and I could use a big boy so I could just relax
He need to have them love-handles in the front and in the back
And, yes, I want ’em three layers like McDonald’s BigMacs
But if we talkin’ girls, yo, I like my women big and it don’t matter what the season
Like ’em thick all year, yeah, yeah

SZA: It’s cuffin’ season
And now we got a reason
To get a big boy, I want a big boy
Give me a big, big, big boy

Kenan: We out here, ladies. We the reason for the season. These bears don’t hibernate in the winter. You know where to find us. We’ll be shovelin’ snow in shorts.

Women: Big, b-big, b-big boys.

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