Inventing Chloe

[Starts with Chloe watching TV show Inventing Anna in her office]

Chloe: Anna Delvey gets whatever she wants.

TV: Your money is coming. Why couldn’t you just listen?

[Andrew Dismukes walks by]

Chloe: Hey, Andrew. Where’d you get that sandwich?

Andrew: Oh, they’re just not in the writers room.

Chloe: Oh, great. I’m starving.

Andrew: This was actually the last one.

Chloe: Oh, okay. [Chloe looks at Anna Delvey for few seconds] Andrew, wait. [changes her voice like Anna Delvery] That’s actually my sandwich.

Andrew: What? And what is the voice?

Chloe: My sandwiches in your mouth? Gives me my sandwich.

Andrew: Okay, yeah. Sorry. I didn’t know.

[Chloe is happy with what happened] [Tomorrow, Chloe walks in office wearing fancy clothes. Her colleagues are eating]

Chloe: This food is basic. Chips are broke ass. We need something more exclusive, more VIP. Like, Nobu. Run it on my car.

[throws a card]

Staff: This is a MetroCard.

Chloe: Run it again.

[walks into Kyle’s room]

Hey, little boy. Lorne says that’s my couch now

Kyle: Lorne said that? Because I brought this from my home.

Chloe: I’ll show you his text is on the way. He’s in the Hamptons right now. Reception is very bad. Very VIP.

Kyle: That does sound like Lorne.

[James Austin Johnson is practicing his Joe Biden impression]

James: Fello Americans–

Chloe: Lorne says I’ll do Biden now.

James: He didn’t say anything to me.

Chloe: Text is on the way. Give me the teeth.

[James spits the artificial teeth on Chloe’s palm] [Chloe walks to Michael Che]

Chloe: Lorne says I’ll host Update now.

Michael: Alright. Bet.

[Michael leaves with his suitcase] [Chloe has ordered all fancy food for the staff]

Staff: I still didn’t get a card.

Chloe: You’re being so dramatic. The wire transfer is on the way cool oysters.

[Oscar Isaac walks in]

Oscar: Ooh, cool. Oysters.

Chloe: What are you wearing? You look ha!

Oscar: I look what now?

Chloe: Pa!

Oscar: Pa?

Chloe: Perr!

Oscar: Pah?

Chloe: Purr!

Oscar: Pe?

Chloe: Pruu!

Oscar: Pur?

Chloe: Haw!

Oscar: Poor?

Chloe: Poor, yes.

Oscar: I look poor. Oh!

Chloe: I loved you in Dune, by the way.

Oscar: Thanks.

Chloe: Say hi to Tiffany Chalamet.

[walking down the hall]

From now all my customers are Scalia, Karolina, Harara, and [gibberish]

Staff: [asking about the payment for the food] Hey, Chloe, any update on that wire transfer? I’m in really deep.

Chloe: [yelling] I do not have time for this. I do not have time for you. I’m a masterpiece, bitches. I can pay. I can pay. [Chloe gets dizzy and falls] Y’all keep challenging me. I can pay. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.

Kate: Chloe. [Kate picks Chloe up] Here you go. I can’t help but notice, you’ve been Delveying everyone today.

Chloe: I can pay.

Kate: You don’t have to do this. The hair, the glasses. The Russian accent, it’s also German. You don’t need that. You just got to be confident. The real Delvey is inside of you. It has been all along.

Chloe: You’re right. I’m sorry.

Kate: It’s okay. I’m just glad I stopped this before anyone got hurt and there were any real consequences.

[the staff asking for food payment is being arrested]

Chloe: Well, I guess I won’t be needing these anymore. [pulling off the glasses] Bye Kate.

Kate: Bye. [Chloe walks away] There can only be one Delvey around here. [puts on her glasses and changes her voice] Very VIP.

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