Kenan & Kelly

[Starts with Kenan being interviewed]

Man: So how did this all come about?

Kenan narrating: It all happens so fast.

[Cut to one week ago. Keke Palmer visits Kenan]

Keke: Oh, Kenan Thompson, the legend.

Kenan: Keke, you having fun?

Keke: Yes, I’m working with my idols.

Kenan: Oh, stop it.

Keke: No, no, seriously, man, I grew up watching you as a kid. I’ve always wanted to work with you. I’ve actually got an idea for this project. I’d love to talk to you about later if that’s cool.

Kenan: Absolutely. Anything with Keke Palmer’s name on it, I’m there no questions asked.

Keke: For real? Because I got this idea for reboot.

Kenan: A reboot? Of what?

[cut to Kenan and Kelly show intro with Kenan Thompson and Keke Palmer as Kelly]
[Cut to Kenan at interview]

Kenan narrating: I should have asked questions. I thought it was gonna be a Jordan Peele produce streaming series. I want to say yes to Kenan & Kel. But now it’s just Kelly.

Keke narrating: I had already sold the show before I even met Kennan. I told the producers we wrote it together.

[Cut to Kenan and Kelly show]

Kelly: Ha-ha. With this place in the shake on kin, because of me, Rigby now sells fresh sushi.

Kenan: Yeah, maybe too fresh.

Mikey: Kelly. I think that salmon you caught might be a Parana. [a fish is biting Mikey’s hand]

Kelly: Oh-oh, here comes the bus.

Kenan narrating: Kel’s famous catchphrase was “Oh, here it goes.” Keke decided to say “Oh, here comes the bus.” But there were no bus.

[Cut to Kenan and Kelly show]

Kenan: Come on, Kelly. You can’t keep taking orange sodas.

Kelly: Just put it on my tab. I’m good for it.

Kenan: Okay. [pulls out a really long list of Kelly’s list] $5,000 with the orange sodas Kelly?

Kelly: Don’t yell at me. Because guess what? I’m pregnant with your child.

Kenan narrating: Keke was gunning for an Emmy Award. So she wanted really dramatic moments in it. And I thought that won’t work. And I was right.

[Cut to Kenan and Kelly show]

Mikey: Hey, Kelly, did you fix the Shush-O machine?

Kelly: Yeah. Good as new. Try out, Kenan.

Kenan: Don’t mind if I do. I’ve been craving a delicious Slush-O for weeks now. [smoke’s coming out of the machine] That seems odd. [the juice pours all over Kenan] No! Kelly, why would you tell me it is fixed. You are such an…

Kelly: What? An idiot? Go ahead. Say it. It ain’t like I haven’t heard it before. My mama used to get drunk every day and call me idiot. That’s what it’s like growing up in Iraq. Sometimes the bottle’s only your friend. My uncle told her to blame me for my daddy leaving. Me! How are you gonna blame a little girl for that man being a coward? How? Oh-oh, here comes the bus.

Kenan narrating: Well, we discarded and I think we have a tone issue. But people seem excited about it, I guess.

[Cut to backstage]

Devon: Hey Kenan.

Kenan: Hey Devin. Good job on the song man.

Devon: Thank you man. I can do other stuff too though. Check this out. [Devon acting like Kel] Welcome to get back home and again Barry Buchanan take your order. I’m a dude. He’s a dude. She’s a dude. Because we’re all dudes. Ay. Stuff like that.

Kenan: Well thank you Devin.

Devon: Of course.

Kenan: But I think we already found someone.

[Cut to Kenan and Kelly show. Kel walks in.]

Kel: Hey, everybody.

All: Kel!

Kel: Oh man, I missed you.

Kenan: Oh man, I missed you too.

[Kenan and Kel open their arms. Kel runs with his open arms, but reaches for soda fridge.]

Kel: Oh, who love orange soda? Kel loves orange soda. Oh sweet baby.

Kenan: Kel, it’s been so long man. What’s you been up to?

[James walks in wearing all black]

James: Hands up, everybody. This is a robbery. Give me all the money in the register.

Kel: Oh, no, you’re not still gonna dime, Mr. Robber. Kenan, you’ve been wondering where I’ve been at right? I’ve been learning the art of karate. Going for this Kel, fool!

[Kel jumps at James. James shoots at Kel.]

Kel: Ah!

Kenan: No.

Kelly: Kel! Oh, don’t die on me.

Kenan: Don’t go into the light.

Kelly: My baby needs his father. You heard that right, Kenan? Kel’s the father. I slept with him just to hurt you. Why do I hurt the ones I love the most? Oh-oh, here comes the bus.

Kel: Ah, here it goes.

[Kel dies]

Kenan: Noooooo!

Kenan narrating: The show is not good. But Jordan Peele called us.

Devon: He wants us to do a sequel to Nope.

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