Kenan Thompson
Ego Nwodim
Molly Kearney
Heidi Gardner
Sarah Sherman
Chloe Fineman
Punkie Johnson
Aubrey Plaza
Male voice: We now return to the Miss Universe pageant, brought to you by 80 for Brady, finally a movie for your mom that your mom won’t like.
Kenan: Alright, welcome back to Miss Universe, one of several shows still on the air where we rank women. But it’s not what you think. We do it based off of looks. Ladies, all right, anyway, we are down to our final seven contestants. Why don’t you remind everybody what country you’re representing?
Chloe: [yelling] Albania.
Ego: [yelling] Canada.
Molly: [yelling] Denmark.
Heidi: [yelling] Belgium.
Sarah: [yelling] Israel.
Punkie: [yelling] Barbados.
Aubrey: [yelling] France.
Kenan: Alright. Lot of energy. Maybe too much energy. Well, it’s time for the interview round. I’ll ask a few questions and we’ll just go down the line. Okay? Favorite food.
Chloe: [yelling] Bread and pasta.
Ego: [yelling] Basmati rice.
Molly: [yelling] Hotdog.
Sarah: [yelling] Gum.
Heidi: [yelling] Sprite.
Punkie: [yelling] Uber Eats.
Aubrey: [yelling] Fries.
Kenan: Wow. Not sre that I made this clear. Didn’t think that I would have to. But you don’t need to scream every answer. Yeah. Also, Miss France, are you okay? All right. Next question. And you’ll have 45 seconds to respond. Where do you see yourself in five years?
Chloe: [yelling] Albania.
Ego: [yelling] Canada.
Molly: [yelling] Dead.
Kenan: Sorry, did you say dead?
Molly: [yelling] Skydiving accident sir.
Kenan: What? Alright, let’s just move on to the talent portion of the competition. Can’t wait to see what you prepared. Let’s pick it up with Miss Albania.
Chloe: [yelling] Tap dancing.
Molly: [yelling] Skydiving.
Heidi: [yelling] Tongue.
Aubrey: [yelling] France.
Kenan: Why would I have you say your talents? Or your brains broken? I mean, I heard you girls backstage having the most thoughtful conversations. Where did that go? [Aubrey walks to Kenan] Well, no, don’t come over here.
Aubrey: [yelling] Ahhh!
Kenan: Help? What do you need help with?
Aubrey: [yelling] Frog.
Kenan: You need help with France?
Aubrey: [yelling] Ahh!
Kenan: Just please go back. Okay. No Back this way. Thank you. Thank you very much. All right. Let’s just move on to the next question. And I don’t know why this is what it is but favorite TV episode? Miss Belgium.
Heidi: [yelling] Nip Tuck season one episode four where Sean and Christian perform an operation on an adult film star.
Kenan: No. You don’t have to summarize the plot.
Heidi: [yelling] And Kimber moves into a bigger condo. I miss Belgium.
Kenan: Miss Albania? You got a favorite memory that you could tell us?
Chloe: [yelling] Shakira Superbowl.
Kenan: The Shakira Superbowl halftime show? Were you there or something?
Chloe: [yelling] No.
Kenan: All right. You know what? Let’s just go to our judges who are inexplicably the Two Property Brothers and Tony Hawk.
All right. All right judges, who is your pick?
Two Property Brothers: France, France.
Tony Hawk: [yelling] Tony Hawk!
Kenan: Wow, it really is the Property Brothers and Tony Hawk. That’s crazy. And fellas, why’d you take this gig?
Two Property Brothers: Bad with Money. I’m his twin.
Tony Hawk: [yelling] France.
Kenan: Alright. I can’t believe I’m saying this but the winner is Miss France. [Aubrey walks near Kenan] Alright. I don’t even want to ask but do you have anything that you want to say?
Aubrey: Don’t take the vaccine.
Kenan: Come on. Anything but that?
Aubrey: [yelling] Tony Hawk!
Kenan: It is Tony Hawk.