The Understudy

[Starts with Chloe narrating]

Chloe narrating: Hey guys, I’m Chloe Fineman. It’s been a really unique season. And people are always asking what happens when a cast member has to miss a show because they’re sick? Well, that’s where I come in. I am the show’s official understudy. So every week I run lines with all the cast members just in case I need to jump into their roles.

[Chloe trying to copy Kate]

Chloe: Do you think we can take it from the top of this sketch?

Kate: Yeah, yeah. Exterior myth Gala. Kate is an E News correspondent.

Chloe: [with Kate’s impression] Okay, so. Hey guys, how are you? Wah, wah, gorgeous.

Kate: You want to get more intimate with it. You want to do a bigger spread? Spread. Spread as big as you can. Just make people uncomfortable with what you’re doing.

Chloe: Wah, gorgeous.

Kate: Gorgeous.

Chloe narrating: To really capture the essence of a cast member you have to shadow them as they go about their everyday routines.

[cut to Chloe copying everything Cecily is doing]

Cecily: Yeah, well, I thought it was funny, but during the show wasn’t on a cue card.

Chloe: It wasn’t on the cue cards.

Cecily: No. Oh, wow.

Chloe: Wow. Yeah. weighing in.

Chloe narrating: Some of the cast members even use me as an understudy for their personal lives.

[cut to Chloe trying to be Melissa on a phone call]

Melissa: Thanks so much for doing this Chloe. I’m so bad at breakups.

Chloe: Truly, no problem. [speaking on the phone] Hey, pal. Oh, man. I had fun too. But a see you more of as a pal, you know? So it’s just not gonna work out. [laughing]  I’m really bad at this.

Melissa: Thanks, pal. You’re the best.

Chloe: Oh, I freaking love you, Melissa.

Chloe narrating: Understudies have a very strict code of ethics. Like no matter how good my Elizabeth Olsen impression is, I would never use it to trick Benedict.

[cut to Chloe talking to Benedict being Elizabeth Olsen. She’s wearing Scarlet Witch costume.]

Chloe: Benedict. It’s your friend Elizabeth Olsen.

Benedict: Hey, Ezzy, you made it. And you’re in costume.

Chloe: Well, I love Marvel. [laughing] Speaking of, do you know who would be great in the next Doctor Strange? Is SNL is understudy Chloe Fineman.

[Real Elizabeth Olsen walks in]

Elizabeth: Benedict, what’s going on?

Benedict: Um, I thought I was talking to you.

Elizabeth: Oh, I’m me.

Chloe: No, so am I.

Elizabeth: I am me.

Chloe: I am me too.

Benedict: Oh my god, the multiverse is real.

Chloe narrating: Has anyone asked me to be an understudy? No. But they haven’t asked me to stop.

[Cut to Chloe doing impressions of the cast]

Chloe: Okay guys, rapid fire. Tell me if I get it. Aidy. [doing Aidy’s impression] Gu-billy-ga-billy-gu-billy, that ass.

Aidy: Nailed. No notes. That ass.

Chloe: Heidi. [doing Heidi’s impression] Hey, dude.

Heidi: Worst one so far, but fine.

Chloe: Sarah. [doing Sarah’s impression] Hello! Hello!

Sarah: Wait, do I sound like a Jewish parrot?

Heidi: Yeah.

Chloe: Okay, who’s left. Ego.

Ego: Pass.

Chloe: And I thank you for that.

Chloe narrating: And I know you guys are thinking, what happens if I get sick? Well, I actually have my own understudy who does a perfect impression of me.

Punkie: [wearing same clothes as Chloe} Yo, bitch. I’m gonna be fine bird.

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