Ross… Kenan Thompson
Gretel… Chloe Fineman
Bowen… Bowen Yang
Sally O’Malley… Molly Shannon[Starts with a group of ladies dancing. Ross walks in]
Ross: Okay, okay, sorry to interrupt. Sorry to interrupt girls. Take a break. Gretel, Bowen, come on, we need to talk.
Bowen: Oh, hey, what’s up Ross?
Ross: Well, as the Jonas Brothers manager, part of my job is to deliver bad news. The boys want to hire new choreographer.
Gretel: You can’t fire us. We invented Joe bro choreo.
Bowen: Yeah, I gave Nick his head bop. He used to go side to side, and I told him to go up and down with a finger shimmy.
Ross: Be that as it may, the boys feel that they’re not a teenybopper band anymore. And they’re about to start their Vegas residency,so they want a more mature stage act.
Bowen: Mature? Who Do they think can do that?
Ross: It’s hard to describe, easier to see. Let her in.[Sally O’Malley walks in]
Sally O’Malley: My name is Sally O’Malley. I’m 50 years old. Not one of those gals who’s afraid to tell a real age. And I like to kick, stretch and kick. I’m 50. 50 years old. 50 years old.
Ross: That’s right. The boys were visiting their grandmother and she took them to her senior centers production of Annie, and Sally here was scarring and she rocked their world. And they don’t want to fire anybody. They were just hoping that, you know, you could let Sally add a little something.
Bowen: Okay, Sally, what little something do you think you could add?
Sally O’Malley: Top five decades of Dirty Dancing and red panting. I got half a century of sizzlin, my lady schnitzel. Nothing wrong with that. Being a woman. The Grand Canyon’s got nothing on me.
Bowen: You know, I’ve engineered my entire life so I would never have to see what I just saw. And Russell, are you sure she’s 50?
Sally O’Malley: Honey, I’ve been 50 since before you was born.
Ross: Can you please just gave it a try? The boys feel that Sally represents who they are now.
Gretel: Do they? Then tell us who you are Sally.
Sally O’Malley: Listen, I’m a choo choo Charlie and a class act.
Bowen: Russell, I love you. I just think the Jonas Brothers are making a huge mistake.
Joe Jonas: Oh, is that what you think, huh?
Sally O’Malley: Well, well, well, if it isn’t Neil, Kalvin and John.
Nick Jonas: Yeah, Nick, Joe and Kevin. And we came by because we the feeling they may not understand your new concept. So I wanted to show him.[The Jonas brothers open their clothes, and inside they’re wearing similar outfit to Sally O’Malley.]
Sally O’Malley: You looking good boys. Now put some bonus in your Jonas. Now hit it Russell.
now kick, stretch
kick, stretch, kick, stretch
Bowen: Wait a second. Wait a second. Oh my god. I am so sorry I ever doubted you, Sally. I see it now. You’re gonna put the boys on stage in packed stadiums around the world and they’re gonna..
Nick: And jump.
Sally O’Malley: Jump? Neil, you’re fired.
Joe: Wait a second, Sally. You can take his place.
Kevin: Yeah, that’s a great idea. Do you know any of her songs?
Sally O’Malley: Absolutely not. I’m 50 years old. 50.