SNL Transcripts: Robert Klein: 11/15/75: Gregg Allman’s Love Life

 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 1: Episode 5

75e: Robert Klein / ABBA

Gregg Allman’s Love Life

Gregg Allman…..Chevy Chase
Voice…..Lorne Michaels

[FADE IN on Allman wearing a feminine-looking long blonde wig, light brown sunglasses, and an unbuttoned blue work shirt. He noodles on a piano while two musicians sit behind music stands in the background.]

Voice: Hey, hotshot rock star Gregg Allman: how’s your love life?

Gregg: [quits playing and grins] Hey, great! [in a spaced-out voice] I got a new album comin’ out, lots of bread, lots of groupies, great band, new keyboards, uh, it’s really great, really great.

Voice: I said, Gregg Allman: how’s your LOVE life?

Gregg: [after a silent pause] Uh, it’s very good, I, uh, I got new keyboards, uh, new album, a lot of bread comin’ in, uhhhhhhh… uh, groupies, groupies everywhere, uh, it’s comin’ in, ehhhhhhh–

Voice: Gregg Allman: how’s your LOVE life?

Gregg: [hits a random note on the piano] It’s pretty good, uhhhhhhh… new album comin’ out, lookin’ real good, hey, groupies all–I know, money comin’ in all the time, and, uh, it’s lookin’, it’s lookin’ pretty fine, you know–

Voice: Gregg Allman, I said: HOW’S your LOVE life?

Gregg: [looking uncomfortable] It’s not bad, uh, Cher and I, uh, we split up, but, uh, that one’s far out, uh, groupie chicks, no bread, and, um, uh… [voice catches] You know…

Voice: Gregg Allman: how’s your LOVE life?

Gregg: [looking lost] It’s, uh… toilet.

[His head drops straight down on his keyboard and hits several notes when it lands. HOLD on his motionless blonde wig for a long moment as audience applauds.]

Submitted by: Sean

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