SNL Transcripts: Richard Pryor: 12/13/75: Kennedy Assassination

 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 1: Episode 7

75g: Richard Pryor / Gil Scott-Heron

Kennedy Assassination

…..Richard Pryor
Audience Member…..Tom Schiller

[FADE IN on Pryor standing onstage and applauding the Albert Brooks film.]

Richard Pryor: Thank you. We’d like to say that we–

[Audience Member is heard shouting from the audience.]

Audience Member: Richard, Richard! Tell the truth! Tell the truth!

Richard Pryor: What?

Audience Member: I have proof! Tell the truth!

[CUT to Audience Member in a cordoroy blazer as he walks toward the stage from the seats.]

Richard Pryor: What are you talking about?

Audience Member: [breathlessly] There were two assassins in Dallas! There were two! I have proof! I have truth, proof! Oswald collaborated with the CIA one month–CIA one month before the assassination! There were shots fired from the Grassy Knoll area!

[Faint voices can be heard in the distance.]

Audience Member: Th–

[A shot rings out, and Schiller sprawls on the stage and lies motionless right at Pryor’s feet. He stares down at him and then looks up nervously.]

Richard Pryor: Uh, I had nothing to do with this. Uh, Dick Gregory started this. I didn’t do nothin’ about that.

[Audience laughs]

Richard Pryor: I don’t care who killed who!

[HOLD on Pryor’s trying to look clueless, then FADE to black.]

Submitted by: Joe Cornfield

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