Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 1: Episode 7
Audience Member…..Tom Schiller
[FADE IN on Pryor standing onstage and applauding the Albert Brooks film.]
Richard Pryor: Thank you. Wed like to say that we–[Audience Member is heard shouting from the audience.]
Audience Member: Richard, Richard! Tell the truth! Tell the truth!
Richard Pryor: What?
Audience Member: I have proof! Tell the truth![CUT to Audience Member in a cordoroy blazer as he walks toward the stage from the seats.]
Richard Pryor: What are you talking about?
Audience Member: [breathlessly] There were two assassins in Dallas! There were two! I have proof! I have truth, proof! Oswald collaborated with the CIA one month–CIA one month before the assassination! There were shots fired from the Grassy Knoll area![Faint voices can be heard in the distance.]
Audience Member: Th–[A shot rings out, and Schiller sprawls on the stage and lies motionless right at Pryors feet. He stares down at him and then looks up nervously.]
Richard Pryor: Uh, I had nothing to do with this. Uh, Dick Gregory started this. I didnt do nothin about that.[Audience laughs]
Richard Pryor: I dont care who killed who![HOLD on Pryors trying to look clueless, then FADE to black.]
Submitted by: Joe Cornfield