SNL Transcripts: Richard Pryor: 12/13/75: Samurai Hotel


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 1: Episode 7

75g: Richard Pryor / Gil Scott-Heron

Samurai Hotel

Written by: Tom Schiller

Samurai…..John Belushi
Traveler…..Chevy Chase
Bellboy…..Richard Pryor

Announcer: Now, another edition of “Samurai Hotel”.

[ open on Samurai placing hotel visitors’ mail in various room slots, grunting as he pushes each piece in ] [ Traveler enters ]

Traveler: Excuse me? Excuse me. I’d like a room for the night, please? [ Samurai grunts ] Actually, I’ll probably be staying through to Tuesday. [ Samurai withdraws sword, accidentally knicking his shoulder ] Do you have a king-size bed? One with a king-size bed. [ Samurai extends sword ] I guess, uh.. perhaps, get a room with, uh.. You know what I’d like? A room overlooking the park. Are the rates high for that? [ Samurai yells, motions sword ] Do you have room service? [ Samurai grunts ] Room service. [ Samurai extends sword ] Uh.. what’s your check-out time? [ Samurai makes series of motions with sword across the front desk, as Traveler fills out the log ] Could you get a bellboy to get my bags, please? Carry my bags up?

[ Bellboy approaches front desk, as he and Samurai yell at one another ]

Traveler: Fellas? Which one of you is gonna carry my bags upstairs?

[ Samurai and Bellboy both extend swords, then run toward one another several times, as Traveler waits. Demonstrating his prowess, Samurai uses sword to slice a hanging ornament down from the ceiling. ]

Samurai: Your momma-san!

Bellboy: [ angry ] My Momma-san?!! [ raises sword and slices front desk in half ]

Samurai: [ in the only English he’ll ever speak ] Well, I can dig where you’re comin’ from.. I’ll take these bags up to the room.. [ picks up Traveler’s bags and carries them upstairs ] [ fade to black ]

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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