Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 1: Episode 11
[ return from final bumper to Peter Cook and Dudley Moore standing with Chevy Chase behind the wooden crate with the bomb package at Home Base ]
Dudley Moore: For those of you who missed the front of the show, we’d like to reconstruct it for you — correctly.
[ Chevy takes out a pair of scissors from his bag and cuts the string on the box ]
Chevy Chase: This is a bomb.
Dudley Moore: Right.
Peter Cook: [ pointing with his lit cigarette ] Bomb!
[ from within the box, a hand rises slowly as it holds the cream pie steady ]
[ Dudley Moore carefully takes the cream pie into his hand ]
Dudley Moore: Bomb.
[ with accurate precision, Dudley Moore balances the cream pie upright and pushes it into Chevy’s face ]
[ the audience applauds wildly, as Peter Cook squooshes the cream pie farther into Chevy’s face ]
Dudley Moore: Thank you very much!
[ as Chevy removes the cream pie from his face, John Belushi emerges from beneath the crate ]
[ Chevy shakes Peter Cook’s hand, then shoves the remnants of the cream pie into Peter Cook’s face; in kind, Peter pretends to suckerpunch Chevy and chase him across the stage ]
[ as pieces of the cream pie continue to be tossed about, Dudley Moore, in long shot, inaudibly addresses the camera ]
Dudley Moore: — with Dick Cavett, with guest star Jimmy Cliff. [ he then whistles loudly, as an offscreen audience members tosses a leftover piece of cream pie at his back, then another piece near his rear end ]
[ the credits begin to roll ]
Announcer: Jerry Nelson was Muppet Scred. Also in the cast: George Coe. Next week, our host will be Dick Cavett and guest Jimmy Cliff. This is Don Pardo saying, “Good night!”