Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 1: Episode 22
[ open on National Uvula association flash card ]
Announcer: And now, a public service dramatization from the National Uvula Association.[ dissolve to Babs and her sister sitting in their living room ]
Sister: Gee, Babs, you look like something the cat just dragged in.
Babs: I know. I feel crummy. But I just can’t seem to put my finger on what’s wrong.
Sister: That’s too bad, Babs. Has it ever dawned on you that it just may be your uvula?
Babs: Gee, no, Sis.. I must have stupidly glossed right over my uvula.
Sister: I had a hunch you might’ve. That’s why I made an appointment for you with a top uvula specialist. [ doorbell rings ] Who makes house calls! Right now![ Doctor enters the living room ]
Doctor: Hello, I’m the doctor.
Babs: That must be him! [ coughs ] [ Doctor sits next to Babs on the couch ]
Doctor: I won’t beat around the bush, Babs.
Babs: Is it bad?
Doctor: In a nutshell, your uvula is on the fritz. Which reminds me of a little joke. Knock knock!
Babs: Who’s there?
Doctor: Babs’ uvula.
Babs: Babs’ uvula who?
Doctor: I don’t know, Babs. But I do know this – you’ve really let your uvula go to the dogs.
Babs: Yes.. I have..
Sister: I’d like to share this with you, Sis. [ opens a greeting card ] “To Babs: It’ll behoove ya’, to care for your uvula! Love, Sis.”
Babs: Boy, do I hear ya’, Sis! From now on, it’s strictly good, clean fun. For me and my uvula!
Doctor: That reminds me of a little joke. Knock knock!
Announcer: Who’s there?
Announcer: The preceding dramatization was brought to you by the National Uvula Association.