Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 2: Episode 6
Land Shark
Woman…..Gilda Radner
Land Shark…..Chevy Chase
[ open on interior, Woman’s Apartment, 2:00 a.m. ]
[ doorbell rings ]
Woman: Who is it?
Voice At Door: [ drawn-out pause ] Uh.. trick or treat?
Woman: [ gets up and walks cautiously to the door ] Look, it’stwo o’clock in the morning. Halloween’s over! Shouldn’t you be in bed by now?
Voice At Door: [ stuttering ] Mrs. Bar- Barsen- Bargen- Barsen..?
Woman: There is no Mrs. Bargenbarson here!
Voice At Door: [ pause ] Candy-Gram?
Woman: Look, I’m all out of candy! I gave it all away! Now, go home!
Voice At Door: UNI- UNICEF, ma’am?
Woman: UNICEF?
Voice At Door: UNICEF.
Woman: Well, that’s different..
[ Woman grabs her purse and opens the door – as she does, the Land Shark peers in, gobbles her up and drags her into the hall. ]
[ Land Shark re-enters the apartment, and stares at the camera. Suddenly, Chevy Chase pokes his head and arm out of the mouth ]
Chevy Chase: “Live, from New York, it’s Saturday Night!“
