SNL Transcripts: Dick Cavett: 11/13/76: Chroma-Trak

 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 2: Episode 7

76g: Dick Cavett / Ry Cooder


…..Gilda Radner
…..Garrett Morris

[ open on Gilda Radner, dressed in vivid, multicolored clothing, make-up, and accessories, smiling before the camera ]

Announcer: And now, Gilda Radner speaks out for Chroma-Trak.

Gilda Radner: My hair… is red! My eyes… are blue! My scarf… is yellow! The people at Chroma-Trak paid me a LOT of money to tell you that my top… is green!

[ cut to Garrett Morris watching in his living room, confused that the colors Gilda describes don’t match what’s on his TV screen ]

Garrett Morris: Green?!

Gilda Radner: My belt… is black! My gloves… are brown!

[ Garrett frantically begins to twist the Tint knob on his set, making Gilda turn a variety of other colors and shades ]

Garrett Morris: I just paid $600 for this thing…!

Gilda Radner: My bracelets… are orange…

[ Garrett flips the set off, then on again, while yelling at it ]

Gilda Radner: … purple… yellow… brown…

Garrett Morris: I don’t see anything!!

[ Garrett begins to smack the sides of his TV st, causing Gilda to jump around inside the image ]

Garrett Morris: $600!! $600!!

[ Garrett finally smacks the top of the TV, causing Gilda to fall out of the image to the floor in a manner similar to how Chevy Chase used to open the show each week ] [ Gilda finally stands up within the TV screen, as the image dissolves to Gilda on the SNL stage ]

Gilda Radner: “Live, from New York, it’s Saturday Night!”

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