Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 2: Episode 10
76j: Candice Bergen / Frank Zappa
FX-70 Cheese Slicer
… Candice Bergen
Johnny … John Belushi
Candice Bergen: Okay, Johnny, what do yousay?
Johnny: [smiles] Cheeeeese!
[Candice points the “camera” at Johnny and presses abutton – the “camera” whirs and a slice of processedyellow cheese emerges from the slot where one wouldexpect to see an instant photo]Candice Bergen: Got it! [hands the cheese sliceto Johnny who happily unwraps and eats it] Anotherperfect slice of processed cheese! And look at thatcolor! It turns from mild to sharp in sixty seconds!
Candice Bergen: The new FX-70 Cheese Slicer andprocessed cheese cartridges. [SUPER: $69.95] Onlysixty-nine ninety-five for all your cheese needs.
[Dissolve back to Candice and Johnny.]Candice Bergen: Hey! What do you say?
Offscreen Children’s Voices: [as Johnny holdsup his cheese slice] Cheeeeese!
[Candice points the “camera” at Johnny who grinsmischievously and raises an eyebrow at her. Applause -fade.]Submitted Anonymously