SNL Transcripts: Fran Tarkenton: 01/29/77: French Liquid


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 2: Episode 13

76m: Fran Tarkenton / Leo Sayer, Donny Harper Singers

French Liquid

Announcer…..Michael O’Donoghue
Third Woman in line…..Edie Baskin
Fourth Woman in line…..Anne Beatts
Fifth Woman in line…..Rosie Shuster

[ open on saleslady demonstrating her product at the perfume counter, a line of women standing in front of her ]

Announcer: Every time you buy a perfume… one million other women are buying the same perfume.

[ close-up of product ]

But now, there is French Liquid. One million women can wear French Liquid, and it won’t smell quite the same on any of them.

[ slow pan across the line of women, from front to back ] [ over first woman in line ]

For example, on her, it smells like wildflowers…

[ over second woman in line ]

On her, it smells like tropic rain…

[ over third woman in line ]

On her, it smells like warm rain pellets…

[ over fourth woman in line ]

On her, it smells like Cicely Tyson’s toothbrush…

[ over fifth woman in line ]

On her, it smells like a dead otter in the drainpipe…

[ full shot of women standing in line ]

French Liquid. Vive le difference!

[ dissolve to audience shot, zoom in on women with CAPTION: “On Her It Smells Like French Kitty-Litter” ]

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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