SNL Transcripts: Elliot Gould: 04/16/77: Goodnights


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 2: Episode 19

76s: Elliot Gould / The McGarrigle Sisters, Roslyn Kind


…..Elliot Gould

Elliot Gould: [ unaware of camera as he paces Home Base ] I’m — I’m on? Weive got sixty seconds to fill, right? Well, I know we’ve got Earl the Pearl sitting up there — [ he gestures to balcony ] [ Belushi taps Elliot on the shoulder, then removes his shades to reveal fake eyeballs attached to his face as he looks around blindly ]

John Belushi: He’s up there?

[ Aykroyd makes his way to the front of the stage ]

Dan Aykroyd: Hey, I’d like to make an appeal — I need a pair of, uh, tanks for a Harley Davidson, a ’71 Electra Glide Police Special. I need Fat Bob tanks. I’ve only got, like, the 3.2 gallon tanks — I need the big tanks. Please write me a letter if you’ve got them. I’ll pay you good money. This is for a 1971 Electra Glide Harley Davidson Police Special — I need the tanks, the Fat Bob tanks. Thank you!

John Belushi: Also… Gail Sears — Gail Sears, uh, I hope your knee gets better, and Dick Butkus, also. [ to Elliot ] My two idols. That’s it.

Gilda Radner: That’s all, say good night!

John Belushi: Gilda, you want to say anything?

Gilda Radner: Nothing!

John Belushi: Say good night to Johnny Carson, Ed MacMahon, and, uh…

Laraine Newman: Doc Severinsen!

John Belushi: Doc Severinsen, uh — we don’t watch your show, but we respect it very much. Elliot Gould! The BEST host we’ve ever had! [ Elliot laughs ] You’re the BEST host we’ve ever had — honest!

[ the audience cheers, as Elliot shakes Belushi’s hand and the credits finally begin to roll ]

Announcer: Next Saturday night, our host will be Eric Idle, with musical guest Neil Innes and Alan Price. Your announcer is Don Pardo. I wonder: should I leave my make-up on ’til I get home? Why not? I look so handsome with make-up! Good night!

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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