SNL Transcripts: Eric Idle: 04/23/77: Oxxon

 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 2: Episode 20

76t: Eric Idle / Alan Price, Neil Innes


[ open on overhead footage of an elevated oil rig ] [ art card: “Oxxon” ]

Announcer: This… is the biggest prop ever made for a commercial — and Oxxon paid for it. The rising cost of oil advertising is just one reason why your energy costs more. These shots are taken from a helicopter. Do you have any idea how much a helicopter like this costs to rent? And for every little film that you’re watching right now, there’s a hundred feet we didn’t use. That’s a lot of film, expensive film.

[ cut to employees working at a massive control board ]

Look at this set — very expensive. And we have to use ALL union actors, and an all union crew to shoot these things.

[ cut to the employees eating lunch in the cafeteria ]

And we’ve got to feed these people. Not just spaghetti, but meat. Just look at this guy eat!

[ cut back to the elevated oil rig ]

And don’t forget about me, the guy who narrates these things — I get paid, too. And once the commercial’s made, the cost just begins. We’ve got to pay up to $100,000 a minute just so you can see this. So, next time you complain about oil prices, turn on your TV and watch an expensive oil commercial like this one.

[ dissolve to art card: “Oxxon, Energy for a gullible America” ]

Jingle: “Energy for a gullible America”!

[ fade ]

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