SNL Transcripts: Madeline Kahn: 10/08/77: Swill



 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 3: Episode 2





77b: Madeline Kahn / Taj Mahal

Swill

Salesman…..Bill Murray

Salesman: [ seated at lunch counter ] As a salesman, I do a lot of traveling. And when it comes to lunch, I grab what I can, usually on the run. And when I want mineral water, I keep it simple, and I keep it domestic. [ places bottle on counter ] I drink Swill. The water that’s dredged from Lake Erie.

[ voice over video of Swill being dredged from Lake Erie ]

Nothing’s added to Swill. It comes straight from the Lake to you. Maybe you thought only European countries had mineral water, but let me tell you: we bottle some pretty special water right here in America.

[ cut back to Salesman at lunch counter ]

Yeah. America. Water with a character all its own. Swill’s refreshing; it’s low in calories; and Swill helps wash down a hearty meal like this that tends to just lay in your stomach. [ pours runny ketchup on his hamburger ] [ Music Over: “Anticipation” by Carly Simon ] [ Plays as Swill slowly pours into Salesman’s glass, complete with sludge, dirt and a flip-top from a soda can ]

Salesman: I like mine with a twist. [ squeezes a lime wedge into his glass of Swill ]

Announcer: Swill. Everything you’ve always wanted in a mineral water. And more.

SNL Transcripts

Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King is directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him nine Emmys and thirteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Mr. King is also the creative director of Broadway Worldwide which brings theatrical events to theaters. The company has produced Smokey Joe’s Café; Putting It Together with Carol Burnett; Jekyll & Hyde; and Memphis, all directed by Mr. King. He completed the screen capture of Broadway's Romeo & Juliet in 2013. - LinkedIn

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